Relinquish
by Zandra's Ashes
Summary: "It's a love story, baby just say yes"- Taylor Swift. What happens when John steps in to escort Elizabeth to Simon's wedding? They are waiting "expectantly" on Earth for the Deadalus to be repaired so they can return to Atlantis.
1. Chapter 1

Elizabeth nestled deep in the plush warmth of the hotel robe savoring the aroma of freshly brewed coffee. She grasped the mug and inhaled deeply allowing the smell of the special dark brew to linger on her nose. Putting the cup down, she rose from the finely upholstered sofa to collect the daily newspaper, still reveling at the thought she was able to indulge in the daily news.

She was supposed to be on vacation, well, partial vacation anyway. The dreaded IOA interviews were finished and she was free to enjoy the remainder of her leave. The previous comfort she'd enjoyed with her life in DC now seemed somewhat disconcerting. Things she had taken for granted before seemed like wondrous luxuries. Chinese food delivery, coffee shops on every corner, and so many lovely little bistros with wine lists longer than mission reports. The streets were overwhelming with heavenly stores stocked gloriously full of clothing, toiletries, and all sorts of frivolous knick knacks. Even this suite she'd somehow been upgraded to at the hotel had only served to enhance her feeling of guilt. She'd been drooling at the thought of the palatial tub, but in reality she found it all rather hard to enjoy.

Even her friends seemed so different. The few nights she'd met up with them, she'd tired quickly of evading their questions about her job and keeping up with their conversations on politics and arts. She was so far out of the loop and in all honestly, she really wasn't all that bothered b y it. Tonight, she was been looking forward to a late evening with her Lantean crewmates, they were meeting after all their nightly obligations had concluded. John was in town because that's where his father was residing this week and he'd somehow pressed John into visiting him. Jennifer and Rodney were attending a ceremony for some award before the trek back home. To Atlantis, she corrected herself. She smiled thinking of the majestic city, marveling at how so easily it had become her home.

As she walked down the hallway someone began pounding loudly on her door. Vaguely wondering when housekeeping starting keeping such early hours, her ears perked when a familiar voice hissed "Elizabeth, hurry!"

Peeking through the peephole in the hotel room door, she found only a mass of unruly dark hair. Frowning, she tugged the robe tighter and pulled open the door. "John isn't it a little early for…." Elizabeth's words were lost to a wave of laughter. He had the grace to look a bit sheepish as he stood before her clad in only his boxers.

He nervously waggled the newspapers he grasped in his hands. "Got locked out of my room, I was kind of hoping to borrow a robe so I can go to the lobby and get a key. I got your paper for you."

She found herself wishing he hadn't drawn her overly appreciative eyes back down his half naked body. Forcing them upward, she found him smirking at her. Before he could speak, the door next to Elizabeth's suite began to open.

"Simon just call security; don't go out there, you don't know what could be going on and…Elizabeth?"

John ducked behind Elizabeth using her as a shield, the newspapers forgotten as they fell to the floor behind him. His hands were firmly on her hips holding her steady before him. Elizabeth froze when she spotted the couple who had entered the hallway each clad in hotel robes identical to her own. Steeling herself, she somehow forced herself to speak. "Hello Simon. _Sarah_. Now I see why I haven't been able to reach you this week. You have been busy."

John's hand gripped her hips even tighter when she said Simon's name. She glanced over her shoulder at John, somewhat surprised to find him directing a menacing glare towards Simon.

"I see you have been busy as well Elizabeth." Sarah's eyes twinkled as she watched John, oblivious to the bitter currents laced through Elizabeth's voice.

John cleared his throat behind her and Elizabeth again managed to summon her voice. "Ah, Simon, Sarah this is John Sheppard. He-"

"Is relived you are friends of hers. Just imagine if the Air Force found out one of its Colonel's was discovered wandering the halls of a hotel half naked, they tend to frown upon that sort of behavior." John moved out from behind Elizabeth, his left hand trailing slowly across her lower back before pausing and hovering there possessively. He stuck his right hand out and to grab and shake the hand of a still speechless Simon Wallace.

Elizabeth found herself surprised again when she peered at John from the corner of her eye. He had planted his most charming expression upon his face and had now allowed Sarah to take his hand, squeezing it firmly between the two of hers. Only John Sheppard could pull off standing in the middle of a hotel hallway in his boxers like he was adorned in perfectly acceptable attire.

"_Colonel?_ You've outdone yourself with this one Elizabeth." Sarah's voice oozed like the saccharine taste of coffee with one too many packs of NutraSweet.

The corners of Elizabeth's lips twitched, John may have been a reputed ladies man but there was a difference between most ladies and the women in the DC political scene. They were the epitome of the term man eater and Sarah's gaze was causing John's usually somewhat infallible confidence to somewhat falter and he began to squirm from the scrutiny. "Maybe I should grab that robe; I got locked out getting the paper. Sorry about the ruckus, but you know Elizabeth. She's hard enough to wake up as it is on the nights we do manage to get a little shut eye."

"John!" It was Elizabeth's turn to blush furiously as John snatched the newspapers from the floor, winked and disappeared into her room.

"Enjoying the view Sarah?" Simon asked, clearly uncomfortable to be caught in this situation.

"Don't look at me like that Simon; I'm still a single woman at least until this evening anyway. I'm allowed to look." Sarah placed her hand on Simon's arm and squeezed affectionately.

Elizabeth's eyes widened as they focused on the rock glistening upon Sarah's left hand. Though she tried, she knew she probably hadn't managed to camouflage the hurt from filling her eyes. Sarah looked at her carefully before taking a step forward, she reached out and tentatively touched Elizabeth's arm. "I thought you knew, I sent the invitation to your mother's address. I didn't know where else to send it since you'd given up your house."

"She's out of town; I won't see her until tomorrow. When…how long have you been together?" Elizabeth's eyes were focused on Simon.

"Simon, you said you told her." Sarah spun around towards Simon.

"Well, he may have told me he'd moved on, but I think I would have remembered him mentioning your name. " Elizabeth sighed and turned away from them. She looked inside her suite and watched John struggling to secure the robe together. He started spinning in a circle like a dog chasing his tail as his fingers sought an elusive side of the tie. Her lips pressed together as she tried to suppress her laughter.

"Elizabeth, let me throw myself at your mercy. Forgive me? I've never felt right about not telling you face to face about the wedding. It's been making me ill, literally. Will you please say something? Look at me? I am so very sorry that you had to find out like this, but you are like a ghost, it's been like you weren't even on this planet! I've tried so hard to contact you, I hope you know-"

"Sarah, please. I'm not upset with you. If you…and Simon are happy, well then that's all I need to know. I care about you both and it eases my heart to know you've each found happiness." Elizabeth's eyes darted briefly to meet Simon's and Sarah's hoping they could sense the truth behind Elizabeth's words. A half second later though her eyes were again locked upon John's. She had no idea how she'd found the strength to meet his eyes as he witnessed her near humiliation. She watched as John gave up on the robe's tie and trotted back towards them.

Sarah expelled a huge gasp of air. "God Elizabeth, you are either the best liar I've ever met or you're on the short list for sainthood. Either way, thank you. I've truly missed you. Please come tonight. The ceremony starts at 7pm, the reception immediately after. It's being held in the Grand Ballroom of this hotel."

"Sarah, give us a minute will you?" Elizabeth whispered.

"No problem. Elizabeth? "Sarah's head bobbed back and forth between her and John's. "You've changed. In a good way, I sense. Very nice snag with this one, I'd pretend to be jealous but well, you can already fault me for the sloppy seconds thing."

Simon sputtered something unintelligible under his breath and began coughing uncomfortably.

Elizabeth watched John close the gap between them. The front of his robe was still open and her gaze wandered from the chiseled muscles of his abdomen up his chest noting the presence of a few silvery hairs mixed in with the others that softly covered his skin. She met his eyes finally blinking, wondering when it was she had crossed that line in her heart. He held her gaze firmly for a moment before reaching out to brush a straying curl off her face.

He slipped a hand around her waist and turned them to face Simon and Sarah. "Well that's nice of you, but we already have a commitment for this evening. We can probably manage to catch a minute of the reception on our way in. Now if you'll excuse us…"

John's hands had found their way onto her shoulders and he was massaging them gently. Sarah laughed, probably realizing Elizabeth had lost the ability to focus coherently when John's fingers went to work on her neck.

Sarah started tugging Simon back into their room. "Yes, well obviously we have a lot to do as well. Elizabeth, I expect to see you two tonight, you'll have a lot of friends salivating to meet your Col. Sheppard by the time you arrive. You know them, they'll be camping outside your hotel room if you don't make an appearance. Who knows, even Simon may have found his ability to speak by then."

John steered Elizabeth back inside her room and secured the door behind them before moving around to face her. "We've been here what, four days Elizabeth? I can no longer count on my fingers the amount of times we've encountered your so called friends. Every time, I've questioned if in fact I want to continue considering myself to be your friend. He was your fiancée, she is your friend?"

"My best friend." She whispered and watched him wince in response. "John, it's different with us and you know it." She said unable to suppress the wavering in her tone.

John tilted his head towards her as his fingers laced through her own, grasping her right hand tightly. He smiled weakly. "I know."

Their eyes locked and Elizabeth's thoughts drifted, remembering all they'd endured together. They both knew their relationship, along with the other friendships they'd harbored on Atlantis, had developed into something much deeper than their friends on Earth could ever thoroughly appreciate. Again, she wasn't even entirely sure she minded though she was aware of that loss, the blissful ignorance that could never be hers again.

"John why did you…you didn't have to pretend-"

"Elizabeth, I don't know what you're thinking or what you're feeling, but it's clear you'd rather be anywhere but that ballroom tonight. Let me help you. I'll ensure that you're dignity escapes without any repercussions. We can have some fun with them tonight, if you'll let me. "

"Defending my honor again John?" Elizabeth's eyes took sanctuary in the marbled floor. "You really are a boy scout. But John, it's really not necessary. I don't c-"

"We can talk about what I am and what I want to be later. Right now this is about you. I'll call McKay, they'll understand. We can see him and Jen tomorrow. I'll cut out of my father's shin dig early and pick you up. Unless you've changed your mind and want to go with me? "John brushed the same annoying tendril of hair away back from her cheek.

It was tempting. If John was willing to play this part, her friends would never forget her endorsement of Simon and Sarah's nuptials, never forget how she had moved on. John was strong and enigmatic; he made Simon seem pale in comparison. She knew how all her friends minds worked, and knew their instinct would be to feel sorry for Elizabeth, see her as a victim. That was one role she never wanted to be cast in. But as Sarah had pointed out, she had changed. Those people were no longer her friends, never really had been she could see now. She wasn't sure she cared much about what they thought of her.

"Elizabeth, I know you're not the kind of person who would use deceit to make themselves look better to others. But I also know you're not the kind of person who will allow other peoples guilt to ruin their wedding day, though personally I believe they deserve it. What will make them feel less guilty- if you show up alone or if you bring a date? You don't have to pretend we're even together, just let them make their own assumptions. We'll have a drink, have a dance and then hightail it out of there to the nearest dive with flat beer and stale pretzels."

Elizabeth found herself laughing. "Now that's a tempting offer John, but it hardly seems fair to you."

"I wouldn't say that, I'm looking forward to spending some time in the company of a man who managed to get Elizabeth Weir to commit to a relationship with him. Maybe I'll pick up some good tips. I'll meet you in the lobby bar at 9:00." John's eyes had darkened, negating the possibility that anything he'd just said had been in jest.

Elizabeth's smile faded, she turned her eyes away from his. The short time they'd spent together this morning had pushed her so far beyond the edge of reason she could hardly remember why she'd never allowed herself to think of him in that way. It was too dangerous to open herself up to him. Hell who was she kidding; he'd slipped right under her skin a long time ago. She just still wasn't sure when he'd taken up so much of the space in her heart.

"It's a bad idea John." Elizabeth took a step closer and bent slightly easing her hands behind his waist finding the ties to his robe before straightening her back as she tied it around him. His breathing slowed as she ran her fingers up the edges of the robe intending to pull it more closely together.

"I don't see what the problem is Elizabeth." John's voice was almost a whisper.

"It's a problem because…" Her fingertips trailed off the sides of the robe onto his chest lightly brushing against the scars he had gained from the Eratus bug and the Wraith feeding. She grasped the sides of the robe again and pulled them snugly together. Striding past him towards the living area of her suite she said, "It felt real when you acted that way John." She could feel him move behind her, stopping just a few steps away.

He took a step closer and suddenly his breath was hot against her neck. "How did that feel Elizabeth? Because I-"

He was interrupted by someone pounding at her door. The inside of Elizabeth's head was starting to throb. She stepped away from John and moved down the short hallway and opened the door just a crack.

"Elizabeth! Great! I'm so glad you are here, I was looking for John but he's not answering his door and when I tried his phone I can hear it ringing inside his room. Where would he have gone without his phone?" McKay paused for a quick breath. "I'm worried, do you think we should have hotel security check his room, there are some crazy people in this town, he could be dead for all we know and-"

Not being able to get a word in edgewise Elizabeth pulled the door open all the way and stepped aside. John was scowling when McKay ploughed into the room towards him still talking as fast as the words could tumble out of his mouth. Elizabeth shook her head as she latched the door and followed.

"Oh thank goodness. I'm on my way out and was afraid I wouldn't be able to catch either of you before tonight. Listen, I was hoping you two would leave me a voice mail saying something had come up and you couldn't make it. I don't know if you've noticed, but I kind of have a thing for Jennifer and I thought, well maybe if we could have an evening alone…" McKay stopped and his head bobbed back and forth between John and Elizabeth. He waggled a finger at John. "You're in _her _room. In your robe! Great, guess it won't be a problem then for you two to find something else to do tonight." McKay giggled slightly at his own humor.

"No it won't be a problem McKay, Elizabeth and I have a wedding reception to make an appearance at." John's voice emerged as a hiss, his narrowed eyes lowering to Elizabeth's hands that had begun unconsciously tightening the tie on John's robe.

Elizabeth gazed vengefully down at her hands. _Traitors!_ She shook her head slightly hoping to shake some of the fog away. Her body was functioning on an all too familiar auto-pilot with John today for some unfathomable reason and just like when they had pretended for Simon and Sarah, her actions didn't feel wrong. It was instinctive and comfortable and extremely unsettling.

"Boy are you ever grouchy in the morning. Guess you didn't get much sleep, eh?" McKay cackled slightly.

"Rodney!" Elizabeth gasped.

"No that's not it either is it; I _interrupted_, just now didn't I? Well you didn't have to open the door! Though if you hadn't, hotel security would probably be breaking down each of your doors about now. How about I just go." McKay looked genuinely contrite. "Took the two of you long enough, I'm not going to be the one to stand in the way of your fun!"

"McKay." John voice was deep and warning.

"I'll just show myself out." McKay ambled down the hallway glancing back only once, a broad smile stretching across his face.

Elizabeth turned her eyes back to John's, they were again directed down. She followed his eyes and found her hand grasping the side of his robe. For the love of…"John why'd you let Rodney believe that we-"

"To show you the sky wouldn't fall. Elizabeth, I need to go, but promise me you'll meet me tonight in the bar tonight at 9:00. If you don't want to go to the reception fine. But either way, it's time we had a talk. I want you to know-" The phone on the nearby desk started to ring. "Damn it! It's like Grand Central Station around here. You'll be there tonight?"

Elizabeth mutely nodded. John brought his hand up to cup her chin, holding her gaze for a second longer. The phone continued to ring.

A small smile finally crept across John's face and he brushed his thumb across her cheek. "I'll be waiting for you."

___

TBC…..


	2. Chapter 2

Elizabeth entered the dimly lit hotel lounge fifteen minutes early. The noisy bar seemed to be bursting at its seams. She managed to snag a seat at the bar when someone finally stood to leave. She carefully climbed into the seat and ordered a glass of wine for herself and a beer for John. Shifting uncomfortably, she marveled to think she dressed like this on a regular basis just prior to her posting to Atlantis. Now she cringed to see the amount of pale skin revealed by the knee length sleeveless dress. The cowl shaped neckline didn't even plunge particularly low, but still she found herself fighting the constant urge to tug it upwards. Anxiously scanning the crowd, she spotted John and stepped down to wave him over. Her heart swirled as she admired how impossibly handsome he was in his dress blues. Stretching her arm out even further, she stumbled in the impossibly high heels.

He swiftly reached her, easing his hands around her waist to steady her. "Too much wine Elizabeth?"

Her skin sizzled from the contact. She laughed shakily, "Too much time wearing boots, I've forgotten how to walk in these things!"

He helped ease her back into her chair, leaning over her to grasp the drinks before her. The bar was filling up with even more patrons standing about pressing John closer and closer to Elizabeth's side. He handed her the wine and took a long deep swig of the beer allowing his eyes to wash over her body as he swallowed. "Have I ever told you that you look amazing in red?"

"Yes well have I ever told you it's apparently dangerous to let you out in public in your dress blues?" Elizabeth gasped realizing she had spoken aloud and spied the glass of wine now dangling empty in her fingertips. Wine was a rare luxury on Atlantis and she had hardly eaten today. Clearly it had gone immediately to her head.

He leaned over her shoulder to put the beer down; his breath trickled hot down her neck. "I definitely would have remembered that Elizabeth." The husky tone of his voice made her skin began to tingle even more deliciously.

"So?" The stubble on John's face razed across her cheek when he tucked even closer to her ear so she could hear him.

"So…" It was the only reply she could manage, she focused her eyes on John's beer while she struggled to gain some control of her senses.

"So, we gonna do this or not?" John reached for the beer a bit too slowly. Elizabeth snatched it from beneath his fingertips taking a generous gulp.

She glanced up at him over the rim of the beer mug, somewhat stupefied at the bemused expression on his face.

"I meant the reception Elizabeth." John chuckled softly.

Ohhh. She'd been really hoping that hadn't been the summary of the talk he'd wanted to have. Thankful the dim lights camouflaged the flush of red on her face; she released the beer into his hand and nodded.

"We'd better get going then, I don't think I'll have the patience to share you very long." John polished off the beer and waved for the check.

Elizabeth hazily watched John sign for the drinks. Guiding her from the bar stool, he firmly clutched her hand ensuring she stayed close behind him as he navigated the crowd. Near the door someone stepped backwards into Elizabeth, fracturing the tenuous hold she had balancing in her heels. John swiveled around and tucked her underneath his shoulder, his arm extending to her waist holding her steady. Her hand landed upon his and his fingers stretched outward threading through her own.

The man who'd inadvertently stepped into Elizabeth turned towards them, a sly smile slowly stretching across his face. "Well I guess you_ did_ have something important to get to."

"Dave, what are you doing here, shouldn't you still be at the fundraiser?" John's eyebrow arched and Elizabeth sensed that John wasn't too happy about the man's appearance.

"Yes well you snuck out just moments before it ended. Dad and I had to make an appearance at a wedding reception here tonight, the daughter of one of Dad's friends. You going to introduce us?" Dave smiled brightly at Elizabeth.

"This is Dr. Elizabeth Weir, Elizabeth…this is Dave Sheppard." John's jaw clenched and his eyes scanned the room behind Dave.

"Otherwise known as his brother, pleased to meet you Dr. Weir." Dave extended his hand, but instead of shaking Elizabeth's he took it and held it smiling incredulously upon her.

"Call me Elizabeth please." Elizabeth watched Dave's eyes widen when they focused on her other hand that was intertwined with John's.

"Looks like we're heading in the same direction." John gently tugged Elizabeth out of Dave's grasp.

"I'll walk with you, Dad's bound to be terrorizing someone in the lobby, might as well round him up too. So are you friends of the bride or groom?" Dave fell in behind them.

"Neither." John muttered, ignoring Dave's puzzled expression.

John slowed his pace when Elizabeth's heels started clinking against the cold polished marbled floor of the lobby. Pulling her more closely against him, his eyes darted from side to side and Elizabeth strangely felt like they'd just stepped through the Stargate to a foreign world and he'd instinctively reverted to defensive mode.

She felt his body tensing beside her and followed his eyes to a trim silvery haired man. The man smirked when he spotted them and Elizabeth's stomach fluttered as she noted the familiarity of the man's features. The man strode towards them with a confident gait, the corners of his eyes creasing as his smile stretched even wider. "Boys, aren't you going to introduce me to this enchanting creature in red? I've always had a fondness for red; few women seem to be able to pull it off quite so enticingly."

_This_ was John's father? He was hardly the man she had pictured from the few times John had actually mentioned him. Somehow, she wasn't entirely surprised. John had to have inherited that natural charm and charisma from someone.

"Dad, this is Dr. Elizabeth Weir, Elizabeth, Patrick Sheppard." John scrunched up his face as though waiting for a barrage of verbal bullets.

"A pleasure to meet you my dear, I hope we will have some time to get to know each other. It's not often I find my son…" His eyes drifted down towards their hands, "entangled with such a lovely woman."

"Really? What kind of women do you find him entangled with?" Elizabeth's eyebrow arched menacingly towards John and Patrick's chortle of laughter almost filled the massive lobby.

"I don't, that's just the thing. Of course, I don't get to see him as often as I'd like. You probably understand better than I the time constraints of his job, whatever it is that his job consists of these days. Speaking of which, thank you John. I know you would rather have been in hell than attend my fundraiser, but the crowd was quite besotted with my son the Colonel. It meant a lot to me after…well I know I never really appreciated your choices but it's apparent a lot of people do. I'm starting to see things…differently." Patrick's face twisted as he attempted to thwart a rising frown and Elizabeth was struck again by the resemblance and similar mannerisms.

John's face was still guarded but his shoulders relaxed and he gave his father a slight nod. His father clasped his hand against John's shoulder and patted.

"We're just heading in to the ballroom now Dad." Dave said.

"Really, I didn't realize you knew them. Friends of the bride or groom?" Patrick asked John.

John growled almost imperceptibly and pulled Elizabeth into motion again.

"Apparently neither. It may be a more interesting reception than we thought." Dave's question filled eyes settled on Elizabeth.

She took a deep breath and smiled feigning ignorance.

"I'm sure we'll see you before we leave." John said as they entered the room. He snatched two glasses of champagne from a passing waiter and handed a glass to Elizabeth.

"They are different than I expected John." Elizabeth studied his face, somewhat surprised to see the corners of his mouth twitching.

"Maybe there's hope for them yet. I thought it would get worse when my father decided to run for the Senate. Then again, he could be just stringing me along to keep me showing up at his fundraisers, having a military officer son seems to be quite useful for him."

"I don't think so, his election will be over by the time we're back in town, err, you're back in town." Elizabeth gulped her champagne and scanned the room over the rim of the glass.

"We'll see. I guess we should find the happy couple now?" John turned and frowned as he studied the crowded room.

They wandered through the room, John following by her side just as he did on Atlantis. It was the moment he placed his hand at the small of her back and the jolt thundered through her body she understood all the whispered conversations she'd ignored. On Atlantis, their closeness had seemed appropriate to her; they worked closely as a team. John probably did work too hard to protect her but it had never seemed odd to her before. Now though as she felt the heat from his fingertips, her body twitched with uncomfortable familiarity of the intimate action.

She felt the pull between them as they walked; it was as though the air between them was supercharged with static electricity intent on securing their bodies close together. They delved deeper into the crowd weaving erratically. No Washington wedding worth attending would have less than 500 invitees, but as Elizabeth reviewed the room she thought the numbers of guests tonight was easily double that.

Bars were set up at all corners of the room and just to ensure no hand went tragically empty, waiters skirted through the crowds laden with trays of champagne. Music was emerging from somewhere in the midst of bodies, somewhere obviously there was a band. Huge bunches of white flowers were nested upon every visible surface. The crisp white décor seemed to hint at the freshly falling winter snow that was currently transforming the city beyond the doors of the hotel.

"Elizabeth!"

"Sarah said you were coming, I can't believe it, it's been ages!"

Elizabeth found herself submerged in a sea of taffeta and silk as friends she hadn't seen since leaving for Antarctica practically carted her away in a wave of embraces.

"Elizabeth who is that gorgeous man?"

"I love a man in uniform!"

"Elizabeth he looks like a handful, I'll be glad to help out!"

Elizabeth found John blushing as he was pushed to the back of the crowd, he nodded his head towards a nearby bar and tactfully retreated. Elizabeth felt like she was dancing as their questions and embraces kept her turning and swirling. She wasn't sure how much time had passed but each time she glanced back at John she found another bottle of beer before him and another adoring Barbie look alike vying for his attention. Many were her own acquaintances who had abandoned her to go drill him with questions, but he seemed to have acquired quite a few of his own admirers. She turned again and found herself staring into Simon's eyes.

"Elizabeth, I was hoping to talk to you." He extended a glass of champagne to Elizabeth.

Elizabeth scrutinized Simon's face trying to remember, trying to feel anything that would stir something more than the indifference she felt at this moment. That door had truly closed, she realized and she couldn't hold Simon responsible for any of it. When she left for Antarctica and for the Pegasus galaxy, somewhere deep inside she'd known she was saying goodbye. She held up her glass of champagne. "To new beginnings."

Simon's glass clinked against hers and they sipped in silence. When their glasses were empty, he finally mustered the gumption to speak again. "Elizabeth, I feel that there are things that ought to be said. Nothing sounds right in my head, I can't find the words to explain-"

"Simon, stop. I'm due an equal share of the blame- if not more- for the failure of our relationship. Tonight is about the future, not the past."

"Excuse me, but I must insist Elizabeth dance with me. " Dave appeared smiling nervously at Elizabeth. "If you won't dance, then I shall be forced to whisk you away before my brother decides to hurt this nice man for monopolizing too much time with his fiancé."

Elizabeth spied John still at the bar glowering so fiercely she was surprised Simon's face hadn't gotten sunburned yet. "A dance would be lovely. Dave Sheppard this is Simon Wallace, the groom."

"Neither. Now, I understand." Dave's face was grim when he glanced back at John.

Simon stood there looking a tiny bit confused and a bit more than overly anxious; his eyes darted constantly back towards John ensuring he hadn't yet begun moving their way.

"Simon, I haven't run into Sarah yet. If I miss her this evening, please give her my regards." Elizabeth moved onto the dance floor with Dave.

Elizabeth's footsteps faltered when they reached the dance floor. "Why did you tell Simon I was his fiancé?"

Dave took her hands and guided her into dance. "John was holding your hand." He said as though that was the key to all the mysteries in the universe.

Elizabeth arched her eyebrow, silently demanding more detail.

Dave sighed, looking at Elizabeth for a long moment. "My father and I didn't notice at first, but after our mother died, John got a little strange about public shows of affection. He never held his girlfriends hands in public, never touched them, and they never lasted if they pushed the issue. It's kind of sad, but we were all betting about whether or not he would even manage to kiss Nancy at their wedding. I still can't believe she talked him into a big wedding, it was almost as insane as this one."

Elizabeth tried to find John, but the crowd had grown too thick in between them. "Well he was pretty distracted, I had probably just grabbed his hand and he hadn't noticed."

Dave looked at her like she was crazy. "Yeah and I can sell you the Brooklyn Bridge if you're buying. Look, Nancy dragged him to things like this all the time. He'd sit in the corner, nurse a drink. She'd flirt like crazy trying to make him jealous. He was either oblivious or didn't give a damn because he realized what she doing. John's changed; he's different with you, protective in an almost defensive sort of way. I haven't seen him take his eyes off you and when you started talking to that Simon fellow I saw the veins start bulging in his neck. You may not know it yet but he does… he's yours Elizabeth."

With that remark the song ended and the crowd cleared enough for Elizabeth to catch John's eyes again. She moved wordlessly out of Dave's arms and headed straight for John. John stood and started walking, cutting through the crowd of groupies who were in the midst of trying to charm him. Elizabeth stopped and John met her on the dance floor, sweeping her tenderly into his arms; their bodies instinctively curling around each others. A new song started and they swayed gently along.

Elizabeth's head tucked into John's neck; she inhaled deeply, wondrous that she had been oblivious for so long. As soon as she was encased in his arms Elizabeth felt the certainty within her heart. Dissecting her muddled thoughts she understood she'd been wrong. It wasn't just Atlantis; it was because of John that Atlantis felt like home, it had always been John since he'd first grasped her hand at the end of the Genii incursion. Her thoughts faltered when one of John's hands tightened around her waist, the other trailed up her neck into her hair drawing her even closer. She heard the lull of Etta James and Elizabeth sighed contentedly. At last.

"So Senator-"

"I'm not a Senator yet Sarah." Patrick Sheppard's deep voice resonated through Elizabeth's reverie.

"But you will be and a Colonel for a son, too bad Dave didn't decide to become a doctor, you could be a family of impressive titles." Sarah's voice trilled almost abrasively against her ears.

"Yes but look at those two. I think the room has gotten hotter the closer we've gotten to John and Elizabeth. There'll be a Dr. Sheppard soon enough. Besides, Dave's more than happy with the title CEO now that I've stepped aside to run for Senate."

"Elizabeth will never give up her name Senator." Sarah chided.

"Well she'll always be Dr. Sheppard to us."

Elizabeth pulled back from John, only mildly disconcerted about how easily his family had married them off. She observed Sarah in her magnificent though somewhat puffy white gown dancing with Patrick Sheppard

"Oh, you're right Patrick, dance us in the other direction, the steam radiating off those two is going to make my hair melt…and the photographer is still around here somewhere!" Sarah smiled mischievously towards them as Patrick deftly spun her away.

Elizabeth was already blocking out the crowd around her when she turned back to John.

"How did you live in this world Elizabeth?" John's voice was deep and raspy.

"I don't think I ever really lived here, looking back, I just survived." She whispered.

"Strange, wonder how many of your old friends would say the same about your life in the Pegasus galaxy, that you just survive?" John was still pushing her, like he was trying to gauge the kind of person she wanted be.

"John, I really could care less what they think." Elizabeth glanced back over at Sarah and Patrick. Turning back to John she hesitated.

"What is it? Wondering when you stopped wanting me just for my body and my ATA gene?" John's voice fell flat at his attempted joke.

"I suppose I could ask when you stopped minding my arms around you in public, even after you've survived suicide missions."

"Okay, throw out all of our baggage. What on your mind now?"

"This world can be so…small. I never gave it any thought before, but I see tonight how easily we still could have met even if it hadn't been for the Stargate program. When I'm in your arms… it feels like that's exactly where I'm meant to be, like somehow our paths were destined to cross." Her eyes dropped from his as he stood eerily quiet before her. She dared to peek up through her lashes and discovered the barriers had fallen away from his eyes; she didn't have to bore into them searching for meaning. Their molten luster emanated need and desire and Elizabeth's knees almost buckled from the aftershocks that coursed through her body.

John took her hand. "I think it's time to go."

They managed to escape the ballroom, John's arm slid around her waist holding her steady as they crossed the lobby's slick floor. In the elevator she nestled her back against his chest. His hands wrapped around her stomach holding her firmly against him, his nose inhaling deeply against her neck. Elizabeth's heart fluttered erratically, her nerves humming with anticipation. John exited the elevator before her, not daring to even look at her. His hand extended back and she grabbed it without hesitation. He had followed her to Atlantis and now it was her turn to take a leap of faith and follow him into the unknown.

She fumbled to tug the room key out of her clutch, when she finally succeeded they had arrived at her door. She distractedly pressed the key into his palm unable to further resist the temptation to touch him. He slid the key into the lock and abandoned it there when her thumb brushed against his cheekbone. Her other hand crept behind his neck and she leaned closer into him; John quickly turned his face closing the gap between their lips. His hands clamped around her head holding her tight, his thumbs brushed slow circles behind her ears before trailing down her neck. Elizabeth felt the tingling start in her toes and bubble higher and higher until she almost feared she would melt into a pool of mush right where she stood. Her head had become entirely too foggy as he pressed deeper into their kiss. John's fingertips traced a lazy path down her sides before grasping at her hips urging her closer. Elizabeth was dimly aware of the cool breeze brushing against her foot when she heard the telltale sounds of someone clearing their throat.

Her lips felt swollen when John pulled away, their noses brushed gently when they turned to the sound of the intrusion. Elizabeth realized she had lost a shoe; she had actually popped her foot up behind her just like a scene out of the movies. His kiss had been the first to ever prompt that reaction in her. Her eyes hazily focused on Sarah and Simon standing before them. Sarah bore an amused expression and Simon was reaching out to return the shoe to Elizabeth's foot.

John snatched the heel from Simon's hand. "You're not her Prince Charming anymore." John gently cupped Elizabeth's foot as he slid the shoe in place. He then scooped Elizabeth up in his arms and somehow managed to dip her card key in the hotel room door properly this time. With a wink at Simon, John said, "You kids have fun tonight; don't do anything we wouldn't do." John kicked the door open with his foot and carried Elizabeth over the threshold.

He eased Elizabeth into the couch and stalked back down the hallway. She bit down on her lower lip to keep from smiling when he opened the door to hang the Do Not Disturb sign. He then locked the door and engaged the deadbolt before returning to the living area and unplugging the phone. He turned and perched upon the desk, regarded Elizabeth carefully. Rising slowly, she crossed the room trying to remember how to breathe. His eyes pressed together, his head tucking down when she reached him. Undaunted, her fingers threaded through his hair. "I won't change my mind tomorrow. I won't change my mind when we're back on Atlantis. "

John's finger's splayed against her hips, alternating between clutching her and releasing as though now that he'd come this far he was still trying to convince himself. Then they clamped down firmly and he stood up, the hair on his face rasping a trail up her neck as he rose. His mouth found her ear. "So, I guess we're gonna do this then, right?"

Though her body was tensing at his bluntness, she couldn't subdue the chills thundering down her spine from his hot moist breath dancing about her ear and neck. The world around her started spinning as a low rumbling laughter resonated against her ear. "I meant talk Elizabeth, you promised me we'd talk."

Elizabeth blinked rapidly and almost managed to focus on John's face. Immediately she realized her mistake, the raw emotion she found there pushed her more firmly over the edge and farther away from anything even remotely resembling reason.

Her lips had become uncomfortably dry and she watched his smoldering eyes glow even brighter when she licked them. She brushed her thumb across his lower lip. "Then it's your turn John, I think I've said a lot more than you tonight. "

"Yeah, well I have a feeling my brother probably said more than enough on my behalf."

"Hmm, I'll concede. That means you're allowed to kiss me again." His lips pressed against her neck. "And again." His lips found her jaw line "And again." They brushed the corner of her mouth. "Again." She whispered and his mouth blissfully covered hers ensuring she wouldn't have to ask again.

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A/N: What can I say, I think cupids arrow may have struck me inadvertently. Sorry for any excessive sappiness, but I can't be held responsible this close to Valentine's Day (I think!) :) Hope you enjoyed!


	3. Chapter 3

The crisp rustling of the sheets stirred Elizabeth from the most intoxicating dream. Her ears perked and hazily she tried to focus on voices drifting down the hallway. The room around her seemed shaded in hues of gray and dark and she blinked trying to remember exactly where she was. Warmth encompassed her body and the lush bedding beckoned her back to slumber. Allowing her eyes to close, she nestled back into the soft bed hoping that just this once she would be able to delve back into that rapturous dream.

Her heart stilled when a low raspy groan emerged behind her. Suddenly the press of hot sinewy muscles was tight against her back, strong arms wrapped possessively around her. Not a dream, she marveled as she melted back against him. His mouth nuzzled at the tender spot between her neck and shoulder, the scruff on his face sending delicious chills racing down her back. His body stilled behind her and her eyes flew open. "John?"

The bed dipped as he pushed himself higher aligning his mouth with her ear. "You expecting company this morning Elizabeth?"

She shifted and rolled back towards him, hooking her heel over and around his hip. Threading her arm under his and grasping his shoulder she whispered, "Think I have my hands full with the company I've got."

John's lips had just barely brushed hers when the distant noise evolved into a more grating commotion. A growl rumbled deep within John's throat and Elizabeth sighed appreciatively at the vibrations echoing between their lips. John jerked away, his eyes searing through the doorway of the bedroom. Elizabeth finally understood it had been a growl of frustration. Whatever was going on in the hallway wasn't just a diversion it was an intrusion. Someone was trying to get their attention and apparently they were growing quite impatient.

"It's McKay!" Tossing the covers roughly aside, John jumped out of bed. He fumbled for the bathroom in the dark and after a thud that made her wince, he limped back towards the bed.

Elizabeth pulled the sheets up around her watching as he tugged in on the robe.

"I'll take care of him." John muttered as he headed towards the bedroom door and the hallway beyond.

It sounded more like all of McKay's team judging from the number of voices emerging from the hall. Suddenly her heart jolted and she leapt out of bed. Cursing softly, she remembered John had taken the second robe yesterday. Her eyes spied John's dress shirt and she yanked it over her head as she bolted down the hall. "John wait!"

His head cocked in surprise back towards her, but the door to the hallway was already slowly swinging open. Elizabeth heard a disturbingly familiar voice float inside.

"Sarah was the wedding postponed? Because I find that normally newlyweds don't look quite so… polished this early the day after the nuptials."

A tinkle of pearly laughter floated inside. "Oh really, and how exactly are newlyweds supposed to look?"

Elizabeth tripped and John somehow managed to catch her before she hit the floor. The door had just reached the fully open position and John was now holding Elizabeth somewhat like he'd just dipped her backwards at the end of a dance. Her hands frantically pulled the hem of John's shirt down trying to conceal her lower body.

"Like them, I'd imagine." A silvery eyebrow arched high regarding the pair. "Good morning Elizabeth."

Elizabeth was surprised sparks hadn't ruptured the air from the heat now pooling off her own face. She swallowed deeply. "Good morning mother. "

John yanked her up abruptly and if she hadn't been so traumatized over her mother meeting John in such a manner, Elizabeth would have been vastly amused by the priceless expression on his face. John looked a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar. She winced as the euphemism crossed her mind. Glancing at John, she noted his endearing mop of hair was spiking wilder than she'd even seen it before. She belatedly attempted to smooth her own curls down, knowing they couldn't look much better.

An eruption of voices pierced the hallway and Elizabeth realized she and John had quite a crowd gathered about their door. Patrick and Dave Sheppard were smirking devilishly behind her mother and Rodney and Jen were chattering off to the left. Simon emerged towards their right behind Sarah, wide eyed at the crowd before him. Elizabeth tugged down John's shirt again, wishing it dipped further below her knees.

"Well Elizabeth, I must say you two certainly know how to cause a commotion." Sarah hadn't even seemed to register Simon's appearance as she smiled upon Elizabeth and John.

Elizabeth shifted uncomfortably. "Err, sorry. We'll get everyone inside-"

Sarah laughed again. "Oh I was talking about last night. The walls between the suites were not as sound proofed as I would have anticipated."

Elizabeth couldn't even begin to find the words to right that comment and instead quickly grabbed her mother's shoulders, steering her firmly inside the room. Behind them Simon's nervous coughing was rattling through the hallway. Patrick was on his cell phone, Elizabeth could hear "Scratch the coffee make that Bloody Mary's and Mimosas. Yes, room 1218. You can put a rush on that right? If it takes longer than five minutes I fear my son may be a dead man."

The few steps it took to walk the hallway into the living area of the suite was not enough time to allow Elizabeth's verbal abilities to recover from the traumatic wake up call. John was equally silent beside her. Thankfully Patrick kicked into high gear political schmooze mode and was instigating introductions while Dave managed to keep the conversation from stalling. Though it wasn't a medical crisis- yet- Elizabeth's dazed and tired eyes settled upon Jennifer imploring the doctor to save her now.

Jennifer cleared her throat. "Why don't you and John go ahead and grab a shower and get dressed. We'll all be fine out here."

Elizabeth's mom turned smiling mischievously. "Yes Elizabeth, why don't you and your young man go get dressed. I'm looking forward to getting to know him…and your friends."

It didn't require much encouragement to embrace their desire to run. Elizabeth and John fled into the bedroom. John pushed the door shut and Elizabeth sank heavily against it, her fingers tracing circles at her temples a half hearted attempt at relief. Her eyes rose curiously regarding John who was now pacing the bedroom floor. The corners of her lips lifted as she took in the sight. His hair was crazy and somehow John just looked comical as he pattered barefoot back and forth wearing only the thick white terry cloth robe. But it was his eyes that brought her smile to the surface; the poor man looked like he was carefully trying to disguise his distraught. He was failing miserably.

He stalled for a moment before her looking bewildered. "I know we're consenting adults and everything, so why do I feel like our parents just busted us renting a hotel room after prom?"

Elizabeth's eyebrow arched wickedly. "That's not a feeling I'm familiar with John. Prom? Really?"

"I didn't, it wasn't…Elizabeth I was trying to make a point. Can you quit laughing long enough to tell me how bad this is? This is not exactly how I pictured meeting your mother."

"So you'd pictured it?" Elizabeth fought to curb her laughter and took a deep breath. "John, seriously? I'm…well, I'm old enough that I harbor little doubt my mother realizes I crossed _that_ threshold to womanhood some time ago. I did live with Simon."

"I didn't know that." John's voice instantly deepened and his stature became more rigid.

"Yes, well _you_ were married John, I suspect you may have lived with someone once as well." Elizabeth's chest swelled slightly at the hint of his jealousy, but she couldn't resist teasing him. "Actually, I'd like to meet this woman; any woman that can talk you into having a huge wedding must have negotiating skills I could learn from."

John's face scrunched uncomfortably, his lips pursed tightly. Finally his face relaxed as Elizabeth started laughing. "I'm going to kill Dave," He managed through still clenched teeth.

She swallowed hard trying to quell her laughter. "All joking aside, that surprised me John. I picture you having a small ceremony, probably outdoors, with just a handful of your closest friends and family." Elizabeth realized her mistake the minute the smirk crossed John's face.

"Pictured me getting hitched have you?" His hands skirted under her shirt lightly tickling her sides. "Who was the lucky lady?"

She swatted at him and he redoubled his efforts tickling her ribs. A squeal broke through her laughter and John shushed her, only prompting her laughter to increase. Someone started pounding on the door. "Enough of that you two! Don't forget we're waiting for you."

"Dave." John groaned.

"Seriously John, you two need to hurry. Room service just delivered and it is just too early in the day for alcoholic beverages to be disappearing as fast as they are!"

"We'll just be a minute Rodney." Elizabeth drew John away from the door. "We'd better just throw on some clothes and get out there. Besides, a shower would be much more invigorating when we don't have an audience waiting in the next room."

A slow smile stretched across John's face as he considered her proposition. "You may have a point. Though I'm gonna need that shirt, I don't exactly have a lot of wardrobe options."

Elizabeth was pulling clothing from the little closet when she heard him clearing his throat. She piled the clothing on the bed, studying his face closely. "John?"

His eyes had been scrutinizing the floor; slowly they drifted up to meet hers. "You're mother's going to hate me, isn't she?"

"This is really bothering you, isn't it?" Elizabeth took a step closer, her hand reached out brushing gently against his check.

John grunted softly and turned his head shrugging. She reached for the other side of his face now, pulling his eyes back to hers.

The pounding on the door started again. "John! Open up!" McKay's attempt at whispering probably echoed as loudly throughout the living room as it projected into the bedroom.

John opened the door a crack and then shaking his head opened it even further.

"Jennifer thought you might need these. I took the liberty of making the front desk give me a key to your room after yesterday's little scare." McKay handed John a pile of clothes and a pair of shoes. "Elizabeth, you need to take the man shopping. All his boxers are cartoons!"

"Thanks Rodney." John dropped the shoes and placed his hand against McKay's shoulders urging him out of the room.

He dumped his pile of clothes on the bed next to Elizabeth's. She yelped when he grabbed her waist pulling her along with him as he flopped onto his back atop the bed. Tucking her dangling curls behind her ears, his thumbs brushed against her cheeks. Still perched atop his chest, Elizabeth tucked her head brushing his nose gently with her own. Her lips had just melted into his when the pounded resumed. She groaned softly and rolled off his chest. John pulled her along with him to a seated position.

"Elizabeth! You need to hurry!" McKay's voice had hit the frantic pitch she normally only enjoyed on Atlantis. "Patrick just topped off your mom's mimosa for at least the third time and I don't think she's has a clue she's not on her first drink. I think he's flirting with her! She's such a nice dignified lady and he seems like, well sorry John, but he seems like somewhat of a ladies' man. Come to think of it, it's strangely a bit like watching you two if you were their age. Interesting."

McKay's voice faded away. John darted out of bed and started furiously tugging on his clothes. "Great, that's all I need. If my first impression wasn't priceless enough, I've got tweedle dee and tweedle dum out there paving my road to hell."

Elizabeth bit down to suppress her smile. Her heart twinged uncomfortably with an emotion…it felt something like the twist of homesickness, but everyone she loved was right here…loved. Allowing the sensation to wash more freely over her, she took carefully calculated deep breaths while she watched him pull on his shoes.

His eyes were narrowed in concentration; she spotted his teeth pressing into his lips. She took a step towards him. "John, my mother only cares about my happiness. She saw my face this morning, she probably already loves you."

His eyes caught on hers, widening in silent question. Her lips parted, but no words escaped and instead she just hoped her eyes managed to convey the surging emotion within. John nodded silently and tugged her within his arms. A moment later, he pressed his lips to her forehead and gently extricated himself from her arms. "Take your time, I'll handle the savages."

He opened the door and Elizabeth was surprised at the silence beyond. "Dave?" John asked.

"You guy's decent?"

John looked back at Elizabeth. She just shrugged. Still wearing John's shirt, technically all the important parts were covered. Dave crept into her line of sight.

"Well, the good news is they are all gone. The bad news is we've all been instructed to Dad's for dinner tonight." Dave grimaced in a frighteningly familiar way Elizabeth thought as she caught the matching expression on John's face.

Elizabeth peered behind Dave. "Where's my mother?"

Dave cleared his throat nervously. "Ah, well there may be more bad news. Dad's kind of, err, well they're having lunch together."

Elizabeth cocked her head towards John.

"Hey, don't look at me. I don't have anything to do with this!" John threw up his hands as if to prove his innocence. "Where are McKay and Jen?"

"Sightseeing. But they are coming to dinner too. Are they together? Because if not-"

"Dave, I'm not sure you're McKay's type, but I can put in a good word for you." John dead panned.

"McKay? Not.. I meant Jen- John!" Dave protested as John's face finally crumpled into laughter. The corners of Dave's mouth twitched, spoiling his pout. He started back tracking down the hall. "Dinner's at seven. Goodbye Elizabeth."

Elizabeth could only roll her eyes at John, she was laughing too hard for words. In fact, she couldn't remember the last time she laughed as much as she had today.

John pulled her back against his chest, his mouth dusted lightly against her ear. "And I thought I'd have to wait all day to get you all to myself again."

Her laughter stalled immediately. His breath on her neck effected her like a delicious toxin, captivating her senses. Stars seemed to start swirling before her eyes, she was hazily aware of John steering her through the bedroom. His hands were massaging her shoulders as he maneuvered them into the bathroom. Moving to stand before her, his fingers fell to the top of her shirt and began slowly undoing the buttons.

"I think you mentioned a shower?"His raspy voice washed against her and suddenly the floor seemed to be swirling as well. His arms tucked around her waist, his nose pressed against her neck. "You okay?"

Elizabeth nodded. "Overwhelming. You, you overwhelm me."

"I'll always be there to catch you Elizabeth." He nudged her eyes up to meet his. "Always."

Elizabeth suddenly wished she'd indulged in some of the drinks that room service had delivered. She blinked rapidly trying to focus. She glanced up at her nervously, feeling strangely timid. "This is one time I think I'll enjoy the fall John."

John's voice fell to a whisper, "I know I did."

She stretched up suddenly craving the taste of his kiss. His lips brushed hers too lightly, too briefly, but before she could complain he scooped her up into his arms. Apparently changing his mind about the shower, he moved them back to the bed. Depositing her lightly upon the tussled bedding, John pried his shirt over his head before lowering himself over her. Her fingernails traced the lines of his arms, his muscles bulging enticingly under the press of his weight.

"Nothing's ever going to be the same again, is it John?" She was surprised by the soft waver threading through her voice.

"No." He said firmly, without hesitation. It was just one word, but his voice was so deep and husky, she'd swear she felt her toes curl in response. John settled down, pressing closer against her body. "It's about damn time."

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A/N: If you still feel the love- and want more- let me know! I hope you enjoyed.


	4. Chapter 4

John strode into the hotel lobby and sighed heavily with relief. Elizabeth was leaning over the concierge desk, one heel was popped above the marbled floor and the hem of her skirt wavered with the gentle sway of her body. Leaving her side that afternoon had been difficult, but his mother's jewelry had been in dire need of cleaning.

The thought almost brought a smile back to his face, his mother would have approved of Elizabeth wearing this, this would have made her happy. She had liked Nancy, but had only once questioned his certainty in that decision. His teeth pressed almost painfully together; too easily it seemed the women in his life had slipped through his fingers. Elizabeth would not be allowed out of his sight again, not while they were on Earth anyway and he still had the precious ability to control that.

"John?" Elizabeth had turned.

John felt surprisingly uneasy to be the recipient of her half hearted attempt at a menacing expression. He must be late, he thought, frowning as he glanced at his watch. At the time he asked his father to bring the box from the safe, the appearance at the fundraiser had seemed too high a price to pay in return. He'd had no idea that he and Elizabeth had been so close to …what they'd become.

She pulled his wrist up to see his watch, her eyebrow arching high when she turned back to his eyes. "Three minutes? John that may be a new record in punctuality for you. I've been forced to wait for much, much longer."

Her eyes lowered, but not before he'd recognized the flash of sadness. He'd become torn about their impeding return to Atlantis, their time here had been amazingly uncomplicated. Soon enough, she'd be again on the balcony outside her office trying to hide the fear in her eyes while she watched his team step through the event horizon. His fingers grazed the velvet box tucked inside his pocket. This would be something tangible, something she could hold onto to. It would be something to remind her he would fight until his very last breath to return to her side.

"Sorry I had to leave in the first place. " John heard a muffled noise from behind Elizabeth and his eyes focused on the concierge sign. "We have plans tonight; I hope you hadn't already given up on me."

"Like I would ever give up on you easily, I was just arranging for a taxi." Elizabeth said.

"That won't be necessary." John felt another twinge, he hadn't been entirely truthful with Elizabeth and he wouldn't be surprised if she hadn't figured that out by now.

"So I've learned. I've been helping Charles here learn how to use his email so he won't miss anymore Code Red's." Her face gave away nothing, her features perfectly composed portraying a relaxed disposition he felt sure was false.

"Code what? John took a step to the side and stretched out his neck to catch a glimpse of the person hidden behind Elizabeth and the computer. He was forced to speak to cover up the uncharming gaping of his mouth. "Charles?"

"One of these days you boys will have to stop giving this old man a heart attack. What happened to the good old company bulletin board Miss Elizabeth? I never missed a Code Red in those days; I always knew when to take a day off if the terrible twosome were in residence." Charles eyes twinkled with humor when he stood up behind the desk.

John found himself momentarily speechless as he apprised the man before him. He seemed shorter, thinner and the little hair he had left was pure white. But the smile was unmistakable as was the warmth within his voice.

"Well, I'm sad to say I haven't seen my BB gun in years though I'd imagine Dave would consider them childish these days. They called us the terrible twosome?" John hoped he didn't look as sheepish as he felt when he took a step closer.

"Yes, and I venture little has changed. I'd imagine Miss Elizabeth has her hands quite full trying to keep _you_ in line." Charles stretched his arms around John clasping him with surprising strength.

Feeling somewhat awkward and not quite deserving of the man's show of affection, John patted his back and gently extricated himself. He eyed Elizabeth skeptically. "You told him?"

"Yes, well what do you think I should have done? He kept muttering about Code Red's and how this newfangled email would be the death of him. I had to distract him somehow, for a moment I seriously thought I'd have to call 911." Elizabeth laid her hand on Charles' arm and smiled sweetly.

"I suppose I should thank you." John looked at Elizabeth. "You may have given me some credibility, given poor Charles a hope that I've actually grown up."

She cringed and hesitated before speaking. "Well…I may have commiserated with some of his stories and contributed some of my own for his consideration."

John felt the muscles in his face scrunch uncomfortably tight. "All right then, it's settled. I'll just have to prove it. Charles, go get the Mrs., you're coming to dinner with us. You ought to be there regardless, it's turned into somewhat of a family dinner."

Charles turned towards Elizabeth, the amusement mounting in his expression. ""See that's exactly the problem. Never could say no to the boss's son, just ask the helicopter pilot."

John was aware of the wave of indignation that flashed hot through his chest. "Now just wait a minute, he wanted to teach me and he didn't get fired."

Charles rolled his eyes while shaking his head back and forth. "Well, he didn't stay fired but I dare say teaching a ten year old how to fly a helicopter would be more than enough to serve as grounds for termination."

John was twisting with unease. "Well, like you said, he didn't stay fired. Though I'll bet it's been killing dad to have to take a taxi across town to board the chopper since the 911 airspace restrictions went into place."

Charles visibly winced. "Don't remind me. Those were not good days. He's grown used to it now though. Tell you what, you promise not to bring that up and I'll go round up the Mrs. It'd be good to see you all together again. Don't know that I have since your mother-"

"Yes well dinners in five so you'd better go find your wife now. Her and the real concierge you ran off the desk when you decided you wanted to work." John turned to Elizabeth. "Charles has been retired for ten years now but he still torments his replacements by showing up unexpectedly and shooing them away from_ his_ desk. He can be scarier than he looks."

Charles focused a scolding glare upon John. "Hmm. For arguments sake I'm going to overlook that comment. We'll be there in ten minutes."

"We're supposed to be there in five." John said.

Charles scratched his chin absentmindedly. "Truth be known, the missus scares me more than the bosses son. I don't think commanding her to immediately walk out the door will endear me to her heart. Ten minutes ought to work though."

Elizabeth raised an eyebrow in reproach towards John before speaking to Charles. "You take all the time you need, if you're joining us we will wait as long as necessary. From what I can tell, you've earned the right to make him wait a little."

Charles chuckled and with a wink he briskly headed off towards the hotel's front desk.

John's hands fell on his hips as he watched Charles leave. He couldn't help but wonder what Elizabeth was thinking now, though he believed he had a pretty good idea. He hadn't been entirely truthful with her; of course at the time they hadn't been…they weren't….His fingers darted into his jacket pocket to finger the velvety box. They weren't what they were today; he only hoped she wouldn't be angry that he'd withheld the information.

"So your father-"

"Sorry, yes he's kind of the principle owner of this hotel. He stayed here with my mother not long after their honeymoon and-"

"The rest is history? Including how you learned how to fly a helicopter at age ten, though somehow I'm not entirely surprised." Elizabeth teased while she moved closer and tucked her arm under his and around his back.

"The story isn't as interesting as you'd think. No crashes or emergency landings. Come on, I've been dreading facing your mother all day, I'm ready to get the next introduction over with." John steered Elizabeth towards the elevator.

Elizabeth rested against the back wall watching him jab in the code that would lead them to his father's floor. And it was a floor- the entire top floor- that consisted of his father's living quarters. It was complete with a rooftop garden he felt sure Elizabeth would love, at least love if it weren't 33 degrees and snowing outside. John was well aware that she was fond of the mild climate in their home in the Pegasus galaxy.

John moved towards her side, not wanting to touch her, understanding how hard it would be to let go once the elevator doors opened again. The box deep within his pocket pressed uncomfortably against his leg and for the millionth time he wondered how she would receive that gesture. His fingers strayed through the curls of her hair and her emerald eyes pierced into his own. The longer their eyes remained locked the more his confidence returned.

His fingers trailed down her side, finally lacing with her own. When the door opened, they silently stepped into the foyer before John again entered the code that would allow them access to the living quarters on this floor. They entered the apartment to find it already bustling with activity and erupting with the voices of the friends and family who'd preceded their arrival.

The living quarters boasted an open floor plan. The living room opened into the kitchen which opened into a den. A large patio with stairs that lead to the rooftop garden lay outside the dining room. Elizabeth's mother and his father were bickering good naturedly with the cook as Dave stood nearby stirring one of the pots looking like he was trying to tune them all out. Jennifer and Rodney were perched on stools across the room at the bar. Only Charles and his wife Joanna were left to arrive and as Elizabeth's mom noticed their arrival and moved towards them, John found himself looking even more forward to their arrival and to the distraction it would cause.

"Elizabeth? Isn't it time you properly introduce us?" Her mother grasped John's hand and finally he relaxed noticing for the first time the warmth within her voice.

John could hardly remember doing more than nodding during the ensuing introduction. Catherine, Catherine, Catherine. Three times he said within his mind, committing Elizabeth's mothers name to memory. Spotting movement from the corner of his eye, Elizabeth moved towards Dave beckoning her closer leaving John twisting uncomfortably beside her mother.

"You seem…nervous, yet my daughter seems very happy. Is it I who makes you so uncomfortable? "Catherine turned her head trying to lock onto his eyes.

"Not you, just a question I was hoping to ask you." John said.

Catherine's green eyes pierced into his own and John was struck by the uncanny recognition as if it was Elizabeth herself boring into his eyes.

"I must admit you've peaked my curiosity." She said. "What is your question?"

"Well…" John's fingers grazed the velvet box within his pockets. "Maybe it'd be easier to show you."

John steered Catherine deeper into the room and further away from prying eyes. There was no point in trying to charm Elizabeth's mother, he'd known that since she'd met him so infamously that morning. But this was the only way he could fathom she'd understand how he truly felt about her daughter. He swallowed hard and took a deep breath before discretely slipping the box out of his pocket.

It felt like an eternity since Elizabeth's mother left his side heading back towards the kitchen island. She joined his father, Elizabeth and Dave who seemed to have taken over and relieved the cook of her duties. John gravitated towards the bar on the opposite side of the room. The beer was across the room in the fridge so he poured himself a scotch, welcoming the heat on sip pooled into his body. It was needed more than he cared to admit. The scene unfolding was one dripping too realistically with the hint of domestic harmony. In his experience, it was the kind of harmony he usually only experienced just before he was about to lose it all. He'd been through that with Nancy, a brief reconciliation just before she'd left. He'd been through much worse with his mother, her illness had lingered and he felt the guilt still that he had prayed for her relief.

He was on his third scotch when he noticed Elizabeth had slipped off to the side. Still across the room she was watching him carefully. Her eyes were wide with what he recognized as her analytical gaze. He knew what she was thinking and she was right. He was retreating, instinctively moving to protect himself from the threat of pain, from the possibility of losing her love, the family they were creating. She needed to understand even in spite of his fear; he couldn't stay away from her even if he wanted to.

"Oh come on, we all know you two are together, the so called cat is out of the bag. Can you please cut out the lingering goo goo eyed stares now? You don't exactly have to pretend in present company." Rodney's voiced was dripping with his trademark sarcasm.

Elizabeth's eyebrow arched in question, he could see her wondering if he would rise to meet Rodney's challenge or allow himself to drift away in the sea of denial and self preservation. John nodded his head towards the door to the patio, already slipping off his sports coat for Elizabeth- snow was still falling.

He was securing the door behind them and Elizabeth had just nestled into his jacket when he saw her smile waver. The box, he'd forgotten the box was in the jacket pocket. His heart began to race, he still hadn't quite settled upon any words that were close to what he wanted to convey.

"John?" Elizabeth pulled the velvet box from the pocket holding it up to ensure there was no question she'd discovered it.

He managed to not bite down on his lip when he took a step closer and pulled the box from her fingers. "This was my mothers. This was the only thing that could have made me leave your side this afternoon, don't think that will happen again anytime soon." He almost winced at his own poor attempt at humor.

Elizabeth huddled deeper into his jacket, snowflakes lightly dusting her hair and framing her quizzical expression. John was amazed that he had yet to even feel a chill.

"Every time I've looked in your eyes, I've thought of this. This was my mothers, she would have loved you, would have loved to see this on your finger." John pulled the emerald ring from the velvet box, glancing only briefly at how it sparkled since its recent cleaning. The platinum band boasted diamonds to either side of the square princess cute emerald. John slipped it on her finger trying to ignore the tears welling in Elizabeth's eyes. It was a damn near perfect fit.

"John?"

He knew he was grimacing when his thumb brushed away a tear that had escaped from her eyes. This wasn't supposed to be a gesture to make her feel bad; he'd never want to make her cry. "I want you to have this, have something tangible to hold onto when I can't be there."

Elizabeth stretched up her arms around his neck, pulling him down to her. "I don't need anything to give me hope John, what I feel in my heart has always been enough to get me through the waits. But this, I never thought I'd see the day when we weren't facing the theoretical end and you'd make this kind of gesture. I, I-"

"Ok boys and girls, I guess the IOA manual doesn't have a category for this, but I'd think it goes without saying that you should always strive to _not_ make the headlines of the Washington Post social page. What's this about the hot couple debuting at _the_ wedding of the weekend?"

John's nose brushed Elizabeth's when they simultaneously turned towards the patio door where one petulant looking General Jack O'Neil stood.

"Oh crap." John couldn't suppress the whisper from crossing his lips.

Dave had emerged just beside Jack. "You're engaged! She'd wearing mom's wedding ring." His voice rang loud enough to stop all conversation in the room behind him.

"Oh Crap!" Jack visibly winced.

John caught Elizabeth's eyes stretching impossibly wide even for her. _Oh crap. _He wondered when Charles and his wife were going to arrive; they were too late for the distraction of their arrival to save him now.

A/N: Sorry for the slow update, if life cooperates, the next chapter will be following in a more timely manner. Hope you enjoy!


	5. Chapter 5

John stashed the remainder of his soiled uniform in his bag as he prepared to exit the locker room. Cameron Mitchell had just hoisted his own bag over his shoulder and the two began making their way out of the SGC.

"Still coming over tonight?" John asked.

"Oh you know I've got to see this. Who knew Elizabeth Weir had a green thumb? Plus I've never been one to turn down a home cooked meal." Cameron Mitchell smirked back at him.

"Yeah, good thing the SGC found something to keep me busy or I'd be far from fighting form when we make it back to Atlantis." John patted his stomach with his free hand. "Who knew she could cook too, right?"

Cameron winced, like everyone else, unable to suppress the pang that hit them all when they spoke of Atlantis. John and Elizabeth had thought O'Neil had arrived at his father's Washington penthouse just to bust their chops over the Washington Post social page; they had no idea he was there to tell them the Daedalus had incurred major damage from the Ori before reentering the Milky Way. Six more months was their best guess at repairs being finalized that would get them all back home. It had already been four.

John scratched his head as the two parted ways, hardly believing it had been so long since they left Atlantis. John had been temporarily assigned to SG1 to serve alongside Cameron. Jennifer Keller was at the SGC too much to Carolyn Lam's delight and McKay commuted daily via the transport beam back and forth to the Daedalus assisting with repairs. Landry had tried hard to get McKay to go to Area 51 and help Carter but McKay dug his heels in, unwilling to be that far away from Jennifer.

John chuckled slightly, amused still by how much McKay's ego faltered when it came to women. It was as though he was afraid Jen would change her mind about dating him if he let her out of his sight. It was a feeling John understood though, he still couldn't believe Elizabeth hadn't chucked him yet. But deep down inside his certainty was rock solid, they were meant to be together. He didn't think there was anyone else who could ever understand him and accept him and all his flaws so effortlessly.

Elizabeth was working from home, checking in via satellite with Atlantis through Cheyenne Mountain several times a day. That had left her with a lot of free time. The home they'd leased was quickly being transformed to an urban oasis as Elizabeth spent much of her free time on the property cultivating gardens. Flowers, vegetables and herbs were quickly sprouting to such astonishing heights John wondered if soon he'd have to hack a path to the front door when he returned home at night.

It was amazing to see Elizabeth so carefree. He'd never seen her so happy as he did now with her four layers of farmers tans showcasing days she wore tee shirts, tanks and swim tops and garden shoes and then flip flops. The more dirt she had to scrape from under her nails at the end of the day the happier she was with her efforts. Every day she looked stronger, healthier and happier and every day the look of anguish over not being there for her people on Atlantis lessened more and more.

John maneuvered the Land Rover through rush hour traffic sorely missing the ease of travel via puddle jumper. He knew what awaited him at the end of his journey though and flipped his Ipod over to some Johnny Cash, strumming his fingers on the dashboard as he trudged along. He felt a surge of energy rush over him when he finally pulled into the drive of their craftsman bungalow styled home. He didn't bother going through the front door, she wouldn't be inside. Even on Atlantis she'd always felt the pull towards the balcony. He'd always thought it was just the water or an escape, but it was more. It baffled him to think of all the time she'd spent inside cold dusty buildings teaching classes or negotiating treaties. Instead, John strode through the gate to their backyard and was greeted by a huge furball hurdling towards him.

"Hey Sedge, thanks for the muddy greeting. I think you're overdue for a bath, our friends may never come back if you get them all muddy too." John scratched Sedge's head as the dog's tail pounded the flagstone pathway.

As though the word bath finally sunk in, Sedge thundered away deeper into the backyard. John followed figuring the furball would be going towards Elizabeth. Sure enough as the pathway opened into the lush backyard he spotted her studying the climbing roses she was training to climb the arbor he'd bought her for Mother's Day. The roses weren't the only thing growing he noted. His cheeks panged as he regarded Elizabeth barefoot adorned in a short white sundress. A straw hat nested upon her head, her growing hair peeking out tied back in a low loose braid. She didn't notice him approaching behind her until his hands drifted across the gentle swell of her stomach.

"Hey freckles, how's the little man doing today?" John nuzzled his nose against her neck.

Elizabeth's face shifted into an expression of mock anger. Swatting his arm gently she nestled back into his embrace. "Leave my freckles alone. And we don't know if it's a boy or girl John, don't take the fun out of the surprise."

John brushed back a tendril of hair that had escaped from her braid. "I can't help it, it feels wrong to keep calling the baby _it."_

"I know but until you come up with some nickname beside tadpole, we don't have a lot of options. We could pick a real name, something that would work for a boy or girl."

"Hmm, I still like tadpole. We can start calling it Yoda when he starts the Jedi like acrobatics." John took a step back to avoid the incoming swat when she turned towards him. "All joking aside, I think we need to meet the little critter properly before we can name him."

"Or her." Elizabeth said pointedly. "Not that it probably matters; I'm assuming any child with your genetic makeup will be a handful no matter what the gender."

"Hey- was that an insult? Because you are only allowed to insult me during the work week and it's" John glanced down at his watch, "It's Friday at 6:30, it's officially the weekend now and we have company due in an hour. That means you have to be nice."

Elizabeth's expression turned wistful. "So strange how easily we've adjusted to life here. You're even working Monday through Friday, you get two days off a week- we have real weekends again."

John nudged her chin back up so he could look in her eyes. "What bothers you more Elizabeth, that you feel guilty over that luxury or guilty because you might not want to give this up?"

"Both." Elizabeth admitted rubbing her hands over her stomach. "A lot has changed John."

But not everything John thought as he glanced down at her bare fingers. So far, she'd refrained from wearing his mother's ring. But she hadn't given it back either. "A lot has changed Elizabeth- in an amazing way. We still have time, we'll figure out the rest."

"Well pretty soon SGC is going to figure out that I'm not just gaining a little weight."

John turned Elizabeth and pulled her back against his chest letting his hands roam across her stomach again. His eyes scanned the garden and flower beds around them. "After the guys eat your food tonight I'd say you'll buy yourself another month or so easy. In my opinion you were too scrawny before, you needed to gain weight. But Elizabeth, we really ought to just tell them, they are our friends."

"I know. " She sighed and leaned back further into his support. "I just don't want to spoil this time before I have to. It will complicate things and I think we're overdue for uncomplicated."

John wasn't exactly ready to face the firing squad either. Just the thought of telling McKay was enough to make him shudder. John was thrilled now but the shock of the surprise had taken them both some time to get adjusted to. Elizabeth strangely enough had been more shaken than he was by the news. He could see the worry in her eyes, as though waiting for him to bolt. He'd probably spend the rest of his life proving it to her but the only running John ever planned to do would be towards her, not away.

Elizabeth's fingers laced through his own that were still resting on her stomach. John knew he needed to jump in the shower and help her get the dinner going but as always was loathe to leave her side even for a moment. They stood there in comfortable silence absorbing the beauty of the garden, the beautiful night and the amazing gift they'd been given of this time together.

A/N: I really truly hope you are not drowning in the sappy nectar and that you enjoyed. If you liked this very belated chapter, the icing on the cake is- the next one is almost finished as well! Hurray! Sign up for alerts and be the first to know when the next chapter posts. Thank you for reading.


	6. Chapter 6

An hour later, Elizabeth stood in her backyard surrounded by Cameron and Jennifer. The warmth of the flagstone patio along with the soft moss that filled the spaces between the rocks pressed gently against her bare feet. She was still adorned in the white sundress but she'd removed the hat and shaken her hair loose from the braid. It hung in long curls dancing about her shoulder.

She surveyed the backyard of the home she shared with John. The scene seemed so surreal somehow. She had never expected to have a life like this, to have friends like this. She bit down to suppress her smile when she spotted Rodney creeping closer and closer to Daniel while talking a million miles a minute. Daniel kept edging backward while throwing Vala pointed looks of warning. Vala had clearly become bored and now stood behind McKay making faces.

Spotting movement from the corner of her eye, she turned and her belly did a delicious flip flop that was nothing like the faint fluttering of their child's first noticeable movements. Elizabeth never expected to find a love like this either. John had just stepped outside, his hair still slightly damp and disheveled from his recent shower. He had on well worn blue jeans that were fraying slightly where the hem met his bare feet. He'd pulled on a light button down shirt. The sleeves were loosely rolled up to his elbows and the buttons unfastened just enough to make her lick her lips as she focused in on his skin exposed on his chest.

"It is too cute to see you still looking all lusty and goo goo eyed at John after four months of living together. You give me hope." Jennifer sweetly chided Elizabeth.

Elizabeth's cheeks flamed crimson because she'd been so obvious. Going back to Atlantis would be very hard, she wasn't sure she could ever portray just a cool professionalism towards John again. Heat seemed to radiate from every pore in her body and her ability to think rationally was irreparably damaged whenever she inhaled his scent when he drew near.

"Don't worry about it Elizabeth, you just looked sunburned. It's the perfect complement to all those freckles." Cam turned around to greet John. "Whoa, I thought I smelled wet dog."

"Woof!" A wet flattened furball bounded out from behind John.

"Oh hey Sedge, it's good to see you too." Cam smirked.

"Funny Mitchell and here I thought you looked thirsty. Guess I'll just go round _myself_ up a beer." John cocked his head to the side trying to hide his growing smile.

John winked at Elizabeth and her belly did the delicious roll again. He headed off presumably to bring out the drink cooler of beer, Elizabeth had already laid out the wine and glasses along with a pitcher of sun brewed iced tea. Sedge bounded off to greet a horrified McKay. Jennifer started coughing as she tried to cover her laughter when Rodney directed a half hearted scowl her way.

"Speaking of cute, you and Rodney seem to being getting awfully close." Elizabeth tried to focus on her friends and toss away the lusty haze that John's presence always shrouded her in.

"Amazing isn't it?" Jennifer nodded in agreement. "I thought he would have screwed it up a long time ago. But seriously, under all that brashness he's a total softy, incredibly sweet."

"You all are starting to make my sweet tooth hurt, and I think Teal'c knocked it out a long time ago. " Cameron protested as he rubbed his jaw.

"Don't worry Cam, I invited Carolyn Lam. I've heard all about how quickly you go "aw shucks" in her presence." Elizabeth teased him.

"What- I do not! Did John say that?" Cameron's face scrunched uncomfortably. "Well yeah, she's smart and easy to talk to. She_ is_ beautiful."

Elizabeth smile stretched wide as she considered the thoughtful look on the man's face.

Cameron began looking closely at Elizabeth. "She's right behind me, isn't she?"

Laughter rolled off Elizabeth's chest as she nodded in confirmation.

"Ok, I'm not turning around until the ground has opened up and swallowed me whole." Cameron winced as shades of crimson spotted the cheeks of his face.

"Too bad for you, John said you were thirsty and sent me over with a beer for you. I was looking forward to having a drink with you." Carolyn glanced down at the glass of wine in one hand and then over to the mug of beer in the other. "On the other hand it is a warm night. Don't worry Cam; I won't let it go to waste."

Elizabeth bit down on her lips to keep from further laughing.

Jennifer nodded towards Carolyn's retreating figure. "Cam, she's walking away." She hissed.

Cameron looked warily from Elizabeth to Jennifer. "I should follow, shouldn't I?"

Both women nodded in unison and Cameron spun quickly on his heel and trotted off with the waves of their laughter floating along behind him.

"I guess I should go save Daniel from Rodney." Jennifer excused herself with a wink when John approached again.

The breeze sent the soft scent of his cologne dusting across her nose and Elizabeth didn't even manage to respond.

John put his beer along with a glass of wine down on the nearby table. His voice rasped intoxicatingly against her ear. "How long will this shin dig last? I'm already tired of sharing you."

"It was our turn John and I don't think you'll have to worry. I think most of the heat we feel tonight is from the steam radiating from all these couples. They'll be scampering home before you know it." Elizabeth managed to speak through her delicious haze.

Through her fuzzy thoughts she realized with relief she was done with most of her official duties as hostess. Appetizers were laid out on the table, along with the side items and bread. Steak was marinating in the fridge ready for John to grill. She could relax and indulge in the glorious bliss that she was immersed in.

Elizabeth felt the ground spin beneath her feet as John spoke into her ear, his arms curling around her and pulling her close.

"I like it here Elizabeth. If you want to stay, I'll stay." He whispered.

"_Thank you." _Her voice emerged as a soft whisper. "Maybe after they deem us too old and rusty but until then I think we both know we have to go back." Elizabeth sighed as John's hands found her stomach.

She was still in shock with how amazing he'd been about the baby; he seemed more at ease with the idea of a child than she was. She'd never dreamed how endearing he could be, how generous with his time and his concern over her and the baby. She never would have dared to hope he'd become the man that he had.

"I brought you a drink." John nodded towards the wine glass he'd placed on a nearby table. When she raised her brow he continued. "Its how all pregnant women get busted, drinking water when they'd normally have wine. It's sparkling cider, perfectly safe for mother and baby."

Before she could speak again, Rodney began to loudly clear his throat. When he had everyone's attention he beckoned Jennifer to his side. Jennifer looked sheepishly from side to side obviously oblivious to whatever he had planned.

"I wanted to do this with our friends around us and though there are many who I have become close to that cannot be with us tonight" He glanced down and Elizabeth knew he was thinking of Teyla and Ronan, probably even Zelenka too. Everyone they had left behind on Atlantis.

Elizabeth's heart panged as she watched John's head drop down as well. She clutched his hand tightly and tucked closer into his side.

Suddenly Rodney dropped to his knee; Jennifer's mouth gaped widely open when she saw him pull a sparking diamond ring from his pocket. "Jennifer, it has been my greatest pleasure to share my life with you these last few months. I would like nothing more than to spend every one I have left with you. Will you marry me?"

It was the last thing Elizabeth expected at the moment and as she observed the gaping mouths of others present she knew she was in good company. A twinge of guilt hit her as John's fingertips grazed her bare hand but then again John had never quite actually proposed to her either. Elizabeth glanced down at her hand. As much sunscreen as she plastered upon her hand it shouldn't be there, but it was just the same. The faint tan line from the ring she wore every day when John went off world, the same ring she hastily removed and returned to its box before he returned home. She never wanted him to know how she still worried. Some things, she reflected, would never change.

She looked up and realized she'd missed Jennifer's response, but her answer of yes was apparent. Jennifer had thrown herself into Rodney's arms almost knocking the poor man backwards, not that he would have minded. Elizabeth never realized Rodney had so many teeth- she'd never seen him smile so brightly before.

He managed to clamber to his feet pulling Jennifer along with him. "A toast!" Rodney cried grabbing the nearest glasses of wine for him and Jennifer.

Just as it touched his lips Elizabeth realized he'd grabbed her glass. Rodney sputtered. "This is horrible- what is it?"

"That's Elizabeth's glass you moron, there is nothing even remotely alcoholic inside." Vala shook her head in disbelief. "Did you think her radiant glow is just from her suntan? She's pregnant obviously."

John and Elizabeth exchanged panicked glances as their friends crept in closer looking quite impatient for their response.

"This is brilliant Elizabeth, delicious." Vala, seemingly oblivious to the complications that would arise from Elizabeth's pregnancy, snapped a twig off mint that was growing nearby in the herb garden. She stretched a twig out to Jennifer who shrugged and took a bite as well.

"Have you all gone insane? John just upstaged me-_again _- and Jennifer, you're eating weeds from the garden. The dog probably pees on those you know". McKay huffed as he watched Cam snorting beer through his nose. "And they're having a baby. Are you crazy Elizabeth? John's hardly more than a child himself on his good days."

"Hey!" John started to protest but just then the sprinklers kicked on and water started raining down upon them all. Elizabeth met John's eyes and started laughing so hard her sides panged.

"Damn it John, I thought we were going to work together for the sneak attack!" Cameron whipped out a water gun and aimed into the crowd.

"Rodney! Where are you going?" Jen's hair was matting to the sides of her face but she too was laughing as Rodney fled waving his hands wildly about in the air.

Rodney stopped at the gate just as Carolyn Lam found the shut off for the sprinklers. "You all, you all are just so-"At that moment a water balloon burst atop his head. "Immature!"

"Bull's pie!" Vala crowed looking victorious.

"And to think they are going to be parents soon" Rodney threw one last look of disgust over his water drenched shoulder before exiting the gate.

"Come on Rodney that was funny." Jen started after him down the watery pathway. "You guys go ahead and dry off, I'll round him up."

"I'm sorry, did I just flash over to an alternate dimension where the most senior members of the SGC just had a water fight of sorts? _Why_ was it that Teal'c couldn't come tonight? " Daniel still had a bit of the deer in the headlights look and was struggling to dry the water off his eyeglasses with his damp shirt. He held them up to inspect his handiwork when a water balloon burst upon his shoulder.

"Bulls pie!"

As though nothing had happened Daniel slipped his glasses back on his face. He quietly strode up to Vala. As she leaned back on the table he placed his arms outside hers leaning low and close as though to kiss her.

"Vala darling?" Suddenly Daniel snatched a nearby water balloon and burst it atop her head. "It's bull eye."

Elizabeth exhaled a huge sigh of relief. If Rodney forgave them for upstaging his engagement, she and John had been saved by the sprinklers. The ever resourceful Carolyn returned from inside the house with a stack of towels that she began distributing. Elizabeth turned to find John looking at her expectantly; probably afraid she was secretly panicking now that their friends knew she was pregnant.

"John?" Elizabeth watched his eyes slant in concentration. "I'm hungry."

A huge smile of relief swept across his face. "Your wish is my command. Cameron, fire up that grill!"

A/N: Sorry for the nuttiness, you know me by now- it's hard for me to resist the crazy for long. I hope to have the next chapter out soon and it will be a little less chaotic, promise Sign up for story alerts and be the first to know when it posts. Thank you all for your enthusiastic reviews, _they mean the world to me! _And by the way, I self edit, so please forgive for the errors I have overlooked in my haste.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: So sorry to anyone who actually read what I posted before. Lesson learned: hit the preview button before posting to ensure the finished chapter and not the first draft goes online. *Blushing furiously with embarrassment* Forgive me- and give it another read.

The sun danced radiantly against the sandy beaches. Although adorned with dark sunglasses and her favorite straw sunhat, Elizabeth found herself squinting to spot John amongst the foamy waves of the ocean waters. In another life, this weekend would be the perfect antidote to the past week they'd spent holding their breaths awaiting any official admonition since news they were expecting a child had been so ineloquently announced by Vala. They'd made no secret of it, O'Neil and Landry were well aware of their living arrangements. But somehow just mentioning the word baby sent people's eyes straying elsewhere and started in the instantaneous uncomfortable shuffling of feet.

The sounds of waves crashing against the rocks of the nearby jetty jostled loose the controls Elizabeth had fiercely set in place around her. She'd tried her hardest to busy her mind with everything she could think of while she was stuck on Earth, away from her Atlantian crew. Much to her mother's delight, she'd taken up cooking, taken up gardening. She tossed her unread paperback to the table next to her chaise lounge and tilted the standing umbrella to shade her more. She settled back against the soft towel draping her chair, still searching the surf for John. She felt the smile stretch slowly across her face. She'd given a turn at love her fiercest efforts of all. But every day she felt she was slipping deeper into the vortex of having absolutely no control- and the darkness was ebbing deeper webs across her heart each day.

She had no right to the bliss she'd found on earth with John, that was what the voice of doubt whispered through her mind when she closed her eyes. She felt stronger in the light of day, but even then Elizabeth was now clinging to John with every bit of strength she had left in her. Reality was slipping through her fingers and she had no idea how to pull it firmly back into her grasp. Reaching to her side, her fingers gleamed against the icy cold glass that boasted an umbrella atop the frozen tropical delight. A soft sigh escaped her lips as she raised the glass, how she longed at the moment that it contain any kind of alcohol.

Water droplets danced like rain against her arm, she knocked her hat off when she abruptly jumped in surprise. She almost toppled her drink over when her eyes discovered the delicious source of her current distraction. Oh god how she again longed her drink contained any kind of liquor. His skin glistened deliciously with water trickling down against his tan and chiseled chest. John planted his hands on either side of her chair leaning closer and she followed the rippling lines of his muscled arms up to his shoulders, smiling as her eyes crossed the spot that always made him moan when her teeth grazed him. Avoiding his eyes, she looked up to be rewarded with his endearing wet and wildly spiking hair. Even his crazy hair was no match for the wild rhythm her heart had begun in response to him now. But when her gaze fell to his, her mouth dropped silently open. She watched the humor fall away as the hunger darkened his pupils. He licked his lips as his head dipped near and for the moment Elizabeth felt all of her inner darkness shatter in his light.

She felt the growl building within his chest before he broke away and it escaped his lips. Glancing around to her side, Elizabeth realized the beach was still too crowded with chairs and umbrellas of the numerous guests of the resort they'd wearily stumbled upon the night before. He sank down on the side of her chair shaking his head.

"Problem?" She teased.

"The surfs almost dead, it's no fun out there." John chewed the side of his lip as his gaze grew forlorn looking at the ocean beyond them.

"Hmm. That is a problem." Elizabeth shifted closer to him feeling his body dampen her light gauze bathing suit cover up. She pressed against his back and whispered into his ear. "But, there's always room service- and dinner in bed."

"I knew there was a good reason to bring you on this road trip," he winked mischievously over his shoulder, his previous distraught washed away and replaced by boyish delight. He stood up before bending over as if to scoop her up in his arms.

Elizabeth pushed her hands against his chest trying to suppress the squeal of laughter. "I think I can manage. And you, you need your strength for later."

She gathered her things and turned around feeling her belly roll under the look he was directing her way. She smiled slyly as she reached out her hand towards him. How could she not love a man who could give her _that_ look when her body was swelling and changing so rapidly. Elizabeth was only glad the nausea of her first trimester had passed so she could enjoy it. Knowing she would be unable to walk if she stayed immersed within his eyes, she turned towards the hotel where they'd taken a room. "Let's go." She breathed.

Somehow they managed to endure dinner on the balcony of their room with their clothing still intact. They survived only because of the distraction the water crashing against the jetty and thus indulging their homesickness of missing the waves that lapped likewise against the piers of Atlantis. They stood now overlooking the waters stuck in that moment where Elizabeth knew John wanted to say more than the trivial quips he managed.

"So, you're all set for my surprise party next week? Dave already said he was flying in with Dad, your mom gonna make it?"

"Dave, huh?" Elizabeth knew with their group of friends they'd never manage to conceal it from him. But there was no way she'd go down without a fight. "Actually the surprise party as a false diversion was Cameron's idea. There isn't really going to be a surprise party, Cam's just planning to whisk you away to a strip club. Apparently Teal'c has never been to one. "

John's head turned in a big circle and when his eye's met hers they were crinkled at the corners and one of them arched charmingly. "There's only one woman I have any desire to watch strip, but it would be pretty damn funny to see Teal'c. So is your mother coming?"

Elizabeth pretended to be shocked. "To the strip club? I think not."

John stepped closer to her, a smirk slowly spreading across his face. "We both know she adores me, I could probably talk her into it."

The curls danced around Elizabeth's shoulders when her body quietly began to quake in laughter. "She does adore you, you could be right. And even_ I_ would probably go to a strip club if you did talk her into it; I don't think I could pass up that photo op."

John's hands grazed her sides, his thumbs splaying out onto her subtly protruding stomach and the laughter instantly fell away under his touch. His fingers splayed against her waist and through half hooded eyes she glanced up through her lusty haze to meet his eyes. She had long ago lost the ability to ignore the hungry and penetrating gaze she knew he reserved solely for her. She wanted to give him everything when he cast that stare upon her. He must have seen the weakness in her eyes.

John's thumb brushed against her bare ring finger. "Elizabeth…"

"You don't have to-"

"_Elizabeth_" His voice emerged as a low and raspy growl.

"Without them, it doesn't seem right John." Elizabeth pressed her eyes tightly together. Atlantis was fine, staying under radar going on few missions and only to the most trusted of trade partners. But still, her worry couldn't be alleviated nor could her happiness could completely unhindered with the guilt of leaving her crew behind.

"I want you to know-"

"I know-" Elizabeth turned into his arms breathing deeply the scent of his skin dusting against her nose.

"Elizabeth, _let me_. You always cut me off, change the subject. It's been months since the damn ring incident. I didn't mean for you to know what it was, I'd asked Dad to bring it to me before we…" John pulled back slightly in discomfort and brushed his fingers through his hair. "I didn't know then how close we were…I didn't mean to put any pressure on you Elizabeth. I thought I would explain when the time was right, thought it would be easy- you'd already have the ring when the right moment presented itself."

"John…" Elizabeth glanced up unable to suppress the tears welling within her eyes.

John laced his fingers through hers drawing her closer. "I was all in before we even began Elizabeth. This never was a dalliance, never a distraction. Before we even kissed... before I even knew. I was yours."

She clamped her damp eyes back together and pressed her body deep against his chest. "John, every day we are away from Atlantis, I should worry less about you- but I worry more and fear the worst for those left behind. I…I can't picture the future anymore; I can't see anything beyond the darkness when I close my eyes to try to sleep. I'm running out of ways to keep myself busy, I don't know how-"

"Shush." John's voice whispered gently. "Then don't think, try to clear your mind. Let me hold you while I can."

Elizabeth inhaled the salty air of Monterey. It was a pale comparison to the beauty they'd enjoyed in Atlantis but tonight, it came close enough. John brushed his fingers across her cheeks threading them into her hair as he pulled her mouth to his. Her body instantly pulsed with pleasure, instinctively tucking against his own as tight as she could. His lips trailed a line of fire down her neck and across her collarbone and her resolve again melted into the strength of his arms. Her muscles relaxed into a heavenly pool of desire that managed to again, if only for a moment, wash away her fears of what they could face in the days ahead.

A/B: TBC- The next chapter will have more action hopefully the inner thoughts didn't drag you down too much, but it was time for Elizabeth's inner turmoil to shine through her newfound domesticity. Next chapter almost finished, sign up for story alerts and be the first to know when it posts. Reviews always deserving of karmic brownie points Thank you all for following!


	8. Chapter 8

A muffled rustling roused Elizabeth from her restless sleep. She could feel Sedge settled in snugly against her feet, which only left one possible source of the noise. Blinking her eyes gingerly, she was surprised to find the light of the full moon was still gently illuminating their bedroom. Rising on her side, she propped herself up on one elbow watching suspiciously as John rummaged through her nightstand.

She could tell he'd been up a while. He'd pulled on the battered jeans he'd abandoned on the floor last night and probably would have pulled on his t-shirt piled next to them had she not appropriated it to sleep in. She was finding his shirts much more accommodating these days. She still couldn't believe how much her stomach had expanded in the two months that had followed his birthday and for some reason she just kept putting off shopping for new clothing. Maybe it was all the extra time enjoying John's bare chest when he was in search of his shirts.

"John it's four in the morning, what are you looking for?"

She would have expected her sleepy eyes to find him looking sheepish over his odd behavior but he was fully alert and more serious than she might have ever seen him. John swiveled towards her on one knee extending the velvet box that contained his mother's ring. The intensity in his eyes burned away the final remnants of sleep from her mind and her heart began thundering within her ears.

His voice was low and gravelly. "I'm not asking you to say yes, I'm not asking you to set a date. But I need to say the words."

"John," Elizabeth reached out her hand to cup his chin and pull his eyes up to meet her own. Panic was flowing through her veins and not because of the question he intended to ask. She knew he had to get an early start that day for one of SG1's rare overnight missions. "Why _now_?"

He ignored her and pulled her hand away from his chin. Swiftly he pulled the ring from the box sliding it onto her finger. "Elizabeth, I want to marry you."

She sat up and allowed her feet to dangle off of the bed as she reached for him. His arms stretched around her waist and his head tucked close to her as pressed a soft kiss onto her swelling abdomen. Elizabeth lowered herself off the bed and onto John's lap. His fingers threaded through her hair, his nose brushing gently against her own.

"John I am not going to marry you because you're afraid you won't come back from a mission. I'll marry you when fear is not the motivator and you can believe we'll be together facing our future together." Elizabeth sighed when his eyes lowered from hers as he tried to hide his emotion.

His head tucked in against her neck. "If you don't like the ring, I'll get you whatever you want 'Lizabeth. Just say yes."

"It's not the ring, I adore the ring." She nudged his chin up yet again. "John, I will wear the ring because I love you and I want to spend my life with you, but you'd still damn well better drag yourself home at the end of every mission."

The scruff from his unshaven face scraped deliciously against her cheek as his mouth travelled to reach her ear. "Just so I'm clear…was that was a yes?"

"Well…." Elizabeth's smile panged her cheeks as she hedged.

John softly growled his disproval against her ear and Elizabeth couldn't suppress her hum of pleasure at the vibrations sizzling down her neck.

"So what you're saying is I might be old and gray and need a cane to hold me up while we say the vows, but still… yes?" His hands slipped under her appropriated t-shirt and began tracing circles on her lower back.

"Yes." Elizabeth had whispered. "If you promise to always come home."

"I'll always find my way back to you 'Lizabeth. Always."

Elizabeth frowned when she heard the pounding on the front door. Her emotions had been swirling wildly all day. She'd alternate between hazily remembering how John had woken her that morning and then worrying about what he was doing now. She'd twisted the ring on her finger so vigorously the skin was almost raw beneath it. No matter how she'd tried to distract herself that day she couldn't move past hating that he'd been so deliberately vague about the details of the overnight op.

As the pounding continued, she pulled herself from her comfy spot on the sofa and peered through the blinds behind her. The sky was laced with ribbons of deep purple of the falling night and amber hued oranges from the setting sun. Elizabeth had already changed to get comfortable for the long – and what she knew would be sleepless- night. She was adorned in capris with her favorite soft worn t-shirt of John's, not quite what she considered to be presentable for company. Unable to catch a glimpse of the arrival, she managed her way out from under Sedge and trudged towards the front door.

"Elizabeth, we know you're in there." Vala's lilting voice carried through the door. "Hurry along; you're not pregnant enough to be moving this slow yet."

The heavy door swung open to reveal not only Vala, but Jennifer and Carolyn as well. All of the women were laden down with the familiar bags of local delis and wine stores. Vala oddly enough was carting a blender as well. Elizabeth slowly blinked as she took another look at the women, a smile stretching across her face.

She decided that she was dressed appropriately after all; all three women had arrived seemingly wearing their nightclothes. Jen had on a tank top, sleep pants and bunny slippers. Carolyn was adorned in a smart silky button down top with matching shorts. Vala hopefully had not done her shopping in her sleep attire, not surprisingly she had chosen a black strappy sleep dress with a lacy plunging neckline and a hemline that barely grazed mid thigh.

Elizabeth's eyebrow popped skeptically, "What's going on?"

Vala limped inside pushing the blender into Carolyn's hands. "Bloody ankle, it's not even broken and these two can't do anything but restrict me from missions and tell me to rest." Vala handed off her other bag to Jen and sank into the sofa.

Carolyn toed the front door shut and followed Jen into the kitchen. Elizabeth turned towards Vala.

"It's a slumber party Elizabeth! All the boys are off gallivanting without us and in your condition, it didn't seem right to go bar bopping."

"Hopping, bar hopping." Carolyn called from the kitchen.

Jen emerged from the kitchen looking perplexed. "Uh, Vala. John and Elizabeth have a blender, why exactly did you bring one?"

Vala assumed her most exasperated expression. "For Elizabeth. One blender for alcoholic drinks and one for her."

Elizabeth was surprisingly relieved to have company to distract her. She shrugged towards Jen. "Seems logical to me."

Carolyn appeared behind Jen. "Well, I brought wine and non-alcoholic beer for you Elizabeth. Jen brought a cheese assortment, hummus and pita chips, and you, Vala all you brought was liquor; you were supposed to bring the sandwiches!"

"It's a slumber party, girls' night. Food is not a necessity, liquor is." Vala leaned forward to rub her ankle. "Besides, I did bring one sandwich; since Elizabeth can't drink it only seemed fair."

"Well my mother and John's father are coming in this weekend. I practically emptied the grocery store today, believe me, there's no danger of anyone going hungry tonight." Elizabeth managed to suppress her laughter.

Jen shook her head in mock frustration at Vala before turning her gaze upon Elizabeth. Elizabeth was trying to tuck some straying curls back into her ponytail when Jen's eyes widened suddenly.

"You're wearing the ring- are you….Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth was stunned that she'd momentarily forgotten she was wearing the ring. Unsure what she should say, she could only nod slowly in response.

"Oh my god!" Jen grabbed her and began jumping up and down.

Carolyn grabbed the pair and tried to hug them both while stopping Jen from dancing Elizabeth around in circles at the same time. She almost knocked Vala backward in the process when she limped to join them.

"Well that certainly tops the response to the news I was expecting a child," Elizabeth's voice was muffled by her friends embrace and they finally released their hold.

"See you all are crazy, you _don't_ need food, just drinks!" Vala tried in vain to smooth her tousled hair.

Carolyn shrugged and said, "Hell, she's right. Pity Elizabeth can't drink; she's the one crazy enough to marry Sheppard. We'll just have to do her drinking for her. Vala, let's go whip up those drinks."

Elizabeth felt warmth beginning to cover the cold pit of worry that had been building within her all day. She'd never dreamed she'd become so close to these women in such a short time, and wasn't entirely sure what she would do without them now.

A half hour later the women were scattered across the couch and floor surrounding the coffee table that was now covered with food and drinks. The second pitcher of margaritas was rapidly draining and a bottle of wine was nearly depleted. Elizabeth felt as though her own non-alcoholic daiquiri was laced with something, the giggles of the other women had proved infectious and she found that finally the knots in her neck and shoulders were slowly relaxing.

Vala pulled a sheet of paper from her handbag and began to clap excitedly. "All right ladies, it's time for the fun to begin. I've been doing research on slumber parties, I Googled it, and I have the evening's activities all planned."

"You Googled it?" Jen's sip fell to the mercy of laughter and she began coughing loudly. When she recovered, her voice was somewhat hoarse. "Vala, we really have to get you out more."

"Why does that frighten me?" Carolyn asked.

"You need another drink." Vala advised her. "Ok, first off- Never have I. We all take turns sharing something that starts with that phrase, and if any of us have done those things we have to drink. I'll start with something easy. Never have I kissed Daniel Jackson. "

Vala took a drink and almost spit it out when Carolyn took a drink as well.

"What the-"Vala's eyes narrowed when Carolyn started laughing.

"Sorry Vala I had to see the look on your face. But I did, I kissed him on the cheek once. He gave me some good advice. He's a good man Vala, you don't need to worry."

Vala huffed indignantly. "I should think not, I'm woman enough to keep my man happy."

"Vala are you sure this is a slumber party game? This seems more bachelorette party game to me, I'm not sure this is a good idea." Jen looked a little worried. "Of course, I never went to a slumber party. I skipped so many grades in school; I never really had close friends."

"No this will be fun. It's a classic _and_ we happen to have two bachelorettes in the room. By the time you two get around to setting dates, you'll probably be back on Atlantis and we won't have the chance." Carolyn smiled and took another sip of her drink before peering slyly at Elizabeth from the corner of her eye. "I'll go next. Never have I ever….seen John Sheppard naked."

Elizabeth chuckled and pulled her glass towards her lips. It was her turn to almost spew her drink across the room as all three other women took a drink. "What the-"

Jen and Carolyn started laughing immediately. Elizabeth turned towards Vala who was smiling like a Cheshire cat.

"Well, Jen and I are his doctors." Carolyn said as all three gazed upon Vala, silently demanding answers.

"And I made the mistake of pulling the curtain back the last time he was injured on a mission." Vala chirped.

"Yes, you look so very traumatized." Elizabeth scowled.

"Well, I must say I thought you were a lucky woman before…" Vala trailed off looking thoughtful, "but now I _know _you're a lucky women."

As Elizabeth turned crimson the other three women burst into laughter. Elizabeth eyed their drinks jealously. It was her turn to get even with Carolyn who'd been practically inseparable from Cam since the night of the water fiasco. "Never have I ever seen Cameron Mitchell naked. "

The other three women all drank and Elizabeth felt her cheeks sting from the laughter. Carolyn raised an eye towards Vala. "I know Jen is his doctor, but Vala- want to claim accidentally pulling back the curtain again?"

"Well, you really should post a warning. Naked Colonel behind curtain or something of that sort. I always thought the curtain was just to keep out the rif raf. Just ask Teal'c, I'd never heard him scream before I walked in-"

Her words were lost to the roar of laughter from the other three women. Vala just shrugged looking baffled.

"Well I guess Rodney has stayed safe from straying eyes, he hasn't been on a mission since…" Jennifer trailed off, suddenly unwilling to finish.

Since Atlantis Elizabeth mulled. John had been unusually quiet about their work the past week and that coupled with his 4 am wakeup call slash proposal now seemed to lend greater credence to the fact that he was worried about this mission. There was more going on than he wanted her to know. "Jen, why did Rodney go on this mission?"

"Something Daniel found has had him jittering with excitement all week. He wouldn't give me any details, which come to think of it should have made me nervous. Usually, you can't get a word in edgewise." Jen's pensive look had returned and she turned her head towards Vala. "Never did I ever hear what this mission was about."

Vala smiled and took long sip of her drink. She sat her cup down and her eyes widened with alarm as she saw the determined eyes of the three women around her. Vala cleared her throat nervously. "Was it something I said? I can still order in food from the deli or we can play another game, for instance-"

"Vala, what exactly does the mission entail?" Elizabeth pressed closer towards Vala.

"Well, don't you know?" Vala look confused. "Elizabeth, I'd of thought you'd be among the first-"

Sedge began barking at the door, his tail pounding furiously with excitement. They're back early; Elizabeth heaved a sigh of relief. Sedge always did that when John arrived home. The knocking at the door ruined her fleeting relief. Reluctantly, Elizabeth crossed the room and pulled open the door.

"Mother! I thought your flight in was tomorrow." Elizabeth reached out to hug her, but her mother's hands were already moving towards Elizabeth's swelling stomach.

"How is the little one doing darling, are you eating properly?" Catherine peered into the room behind her. "Goodness gracious Elizabeth- and what are you drinking?"

"Mother two of them are my doctors, I can assure you my beverage is non-alcoholic. Where are your bags?"

"The boys will be along with them any minute. Where's John?"

"Working, he'll be home sometime tomorrow afternoon." Elizabeth frowned still secretly hoping he'd return much sooner.

"Well it's too bad; the boys were looking forward to seeing him tonight."

"I'm sure he- Mother who are these boys you keep mentioning?" Elizabeth moved onto the front porch for a closer look.

"Well, I got a ride in from Washington with-"

"Patrick! Dave!" Elizabeth moved deeper onto the porch to meet them as they struggled under her mother's luggage.

"Yes as I was saying Patrick called me up this morning and they were flying out tonight. Elizabeth, did you know that John learned how to fly a helicopter when he was ten?"

"I've heard mother." Elizabeth gasped as Patrick pulled her into a bear hug.

"Mind the baby Patrick!" Catherine shook her head at him like he was a child, but her eyes twinkling brightly at the man. "I still can't believe they refuse to find out if it is a boy or girl. How am I supposed to shop?"

"Good to see you again Elizabeth, as always, I'm impressed with the company you keep." Dave nodded into the room beyond spotting Jen and Carolyn and looking wide eyed at Vala preening on the couch.

"Elizabeth! You're wearing the ring John gave you- are you finally engaged?" Catherine stepped closer to Elizabeth pulling her hand up to ensure no one missed her ring laden hand.

Elizabeth slowly started to nod her head. "Yes."

Her mother squealed and Patrick nodded smiling his approval. "Don't get too excited yet mother, I believe it's going to be a long engagement."

"Yes, but time does fly, does it not?" Catherine said as she patted Elizabeth's stomach.

"Well come along everyone, we're just having a bit of fun while the boys are off worl- er- off working tonight." Vala said.

Ten minutes later they were all gathered around the coffee table and everyone had a drink and a hand of cards. Patrick was taking great joy in teaching her mother how to play poker and Dave seemed quite taken with Vala's antics.

"I'm just going to take Sedge out back, get a bit of fresh air." Elizabeth excused herself.

She hadn't been expecting any company, much less _that _much company and these days she tired easily. Pattering through the back yard with Sedge she inhaled deeply, drawing in the cool sweet air of the night. They were a day away from the Friday that would kick off Labor Day weekend and the smell of the coming fall season seemed to skim upon the air.

She settled into a bench tucked beside a large oak tree and pulled her knees up towards her chest, smiling when she remembered the obstacle in the way. Absentmindedly her hands fell to her stomach as she watched Sedge snooping around in the flower beds. Just a few more months and the Deadalus would be ready. Their child would be born on Atlantis, the first birth there in thousands of years. Amazingly, the IOA had given her the full stamp of approval to return to work after she'd disclaimed her condition. Too bad they still refused to let Sedge come along.

Elizabeth was deep in thought and hadn't noticed Sedge had drawn away from her until he came bounding back down the path towards her. Behind him, a shadowy form followed with slow and deliberate footsteps. It wasn't John; John knew the path by heart even in the dark. She'd just risen when Cameron's face came into view.

"Cameron, what's wrong?" Her eyes strained to see behind him, see anything but the anguish in his eyes. "Where is John?"

"Elizabeth, I'm sorry. McKay and Carter are back at the SGC trying to figure that out." Cam ran his fingers haphazardly through his hair before throwing his hands up in frustration. "We don't know where he is."

Elizabeth stumbled and the darkness of the night seemed to seep inside her head. The ground felt like it was swirling and she felt her knees begin to buckle. Cameron wrapped his arms around her hugging her tightly as he tried to keep her on her feet.

"It was an uninhabited planet, just a reconnaissance mission. This shouldn't have happened. We were ambushed and got separated. No one should have been there; I don't know how the hell this happened." Cam pulled back just enough to look in her eyes.

Cameron seemed to be moving away from her and his words had become distant and mottled.

"Carolyn! I could use some help out here."

The light to the back porch flashed on and Elizabeth realized he couldn't have been whispering if they had heard him inside the house.

"Stay with me Elizabeth. We'll find him, I promise you if it's the last thing I do, I will find him. _We'll_ find him." It was the last thing she heard before she succumbed to the darkness.

A/N: Thanks for hanging in there- it was a long chapter and for the first time in this story our favorite couple didn't get a happy ending at the day's end. I hope you'll continue to follow and see what tomorrow brings. Sign up for story alerts and be the first to know when the next chapter posts.


	9. Chapter 9

"Elizabeth, 'Lizabeth-…wake up."

Sleep seemed like such a luxury still, even so many months after Atlantis, Elizabeth resisted the intrusion to her rest.

"Come on 'Lizabeth, you and Sedge are covering the whole bed, you know you want to make some room for me."

John was home early, Elizabeth smiled sleepily. He was supposed to be on an overnight op and she hated the nights without him. But for some reason her body was so weary, she couldn't seem to find the strength to respond.

"I see what you're up too; you must have really missed me. If you don't make room next to you I'll just have to crawl on top of you." John's voice rasped mischievously. "You know, you really do some of your best thinking late at night."

She could feel him moving above her and she managed to raise her hand to thread it through his hair wanting to pull him closer. As soon as she her fingers struck the threads of his hair her heart jilted and she fought to open her eyes. Something was wrong, _this_ was wrong. John's hair felt…different and coarse.

Finally focusing through the dim lighting, she found herself staring into the eyes of Cameron Mitchell. One of his eyes was puffy and swollen, but as her memory came rushing back the look she'd seen in them earlier was perfectly clear. Anguish. Allowing her eyes to press together again, she longed for the darkness to sweep her back to the memory of John's last overnight op. If only she could awaken in his arms again.

"Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth could hear the fear laced through Cameron's voice. She blinked slowly again and found Carolyn holding her wrist and checking her pulse. Gingerly she tried to rise as her mother's voice carried throughout the yard.

"You sure you can stand?" Cameron asked.

"I don't have a choice Cam." Elizabeth's voice was still shaky.

"Senator, give me a minute. I'll explain after I make sure Elizabeth is all right." Jack O'Neill directed towards Patrick before striding towards her.

Jennifer emerged behind him holding a kitchen towel. "Mrs. Weir, we'll be in soon. I know it's hard to wait, Elizabeth will be fine, but I want Carolyn to finish checking her first."

Elizabeth didn't even try to keep her eyes from shutting now. Her mother was inside. John's father and John's brother were inside, all waiting for an explanation. Elizabeth tried to remember how she had survived this before, all those moments on Atlantis she'd agonized over John's safety. She futilely tried to summon that strength.

Her mother ignored Jen and plowed ahead of her and Jack. "Elizabeth, are you all right? Has something happened to John?"

Elizabeth's shoulders were shaking violently and when she pulled her head up to meet her mother's eyes tears began flooding down her face.

She took a deep breath and tried to square her shoulders. "It will be okay mother. I told him he'd better drag his damn self home at the end of every mission." Elizabeth twisted the ring on her finger and her voice emerged with only a slight waver the next time she spoke. "He promised. "

Daniel cleared his throat. "Actually Elizabeth, I think you can help him fulfill that promise. I came to ask for your help, that is if your Ancient hasn't got too rusty?"

"Ancient?" Dave asked.

Elizabeth peered around the crowd wondering who else had crept into the back yard after she had passed out.

"Oh, crap." Jack scowled. "I'd better call the President. Looks like we're gonna have a little problem adhering to security clearance around here."

Elizabeth tried to fight back the rest of the tears building within her and focus on Jack's retreating figure.

"Elizabeth, what's happened?" Patrick's voice tugged at her heart with his unasked question.

"John was separated from his team; they have lost contact with him and can't locate him. Let Gen. O'Neill make that phone call and perhaps we'll be able to explain everything in more detail. I'm sorry to ask you to wait for a more thorough explanation; believe me, _I_ understand how hard this must be for you. But if the President approves it, the explanation will be more detailed … and possibly less frustrating."

She hoped the President was amenable to late night phone calls, not that it would make the coming hours easier to their families.

"Let's give Elizabeth some space. I need to take her back inside and finish this exam under some light." Carolyn nodded for Cam to start some crowd control.

Daniel began to gently nudge everyone inside while Jack paced back and forth a few feet away. His expression gave nothing away, but Elizabeth could clearly see he was on edge. The phone call most likely was not going well. She turned back to Cameron.

"Cam, his locater implant?" Elizabeth dared to whisper. She wasn't entirely sure she was ready to hear the answer.

"Elizabeth we sent a MALP and we've already been back to the planet. We didn't stay long, it was too dark for an effective search, but we couldn't pick up his signal." Cameron finally pulled his head up and met her eyes. "We're hoping his signal was disrupted, we believe there was a settlement or lab on that planet. One of Teal'c's Jaffa allies came through the Gate before we arrived. Nothing showed up from the aerial inspection. Based on what we encountered, it's entirely possible the structure is underground. We're set to go back at first light."

Elizabeth fell silent, pondering the possibilities and didn't notice Jen creeping up beside her. "Elizabeth, I was getting some ice and I found something. It was taped to a pint of Ben and Jerry's; I can't believe Carolyn didn't see it when she was making drinks earlier."

"Jen, I don't think we need any more drinks tonight." Though her long suppressed coffee craving was rearing its ugly head and her head was starting to ache.

"You fainted Elizabeth. The ice is for Cam's eye; your elbow slammed his eye when he caught you."

Elizabeth glanced back to Cam's swollen eye and winced.

"Don't worry about it; Teal'c has done much worse damage." Cameron shrugged.

"Elizabeth I think you should look at this." Jen handed her a note.

Elizabeth began to blot her eyes as she read John's messy scrawl. "_It was either tape this to the ice cream or the pickles and you haven't quite hit the pickle craving yet. I left a surprise for you in the guest bedroom. I would have given it to you in person, but, well, you just said yes and I didn't want to risk you taking the ring off again. I'll be home soon 'Lizabeth, stop worrying." _

She numbly handed the note to Jen and kept walking slowly towards the back door, trying to ignore Sedge whimpering on the back porch.

"Cam, we need to take Elizabeth upstairs to the bedroom. Can you make sure we get some privacy?" Jen asked as she passed the note to Carolyn.

"Just don't take too long, her mother scares me."

It seemed it had never taken longer for Elizabeth to climb the stairs to the four upstairs bedrooms. She wasn't sure which one John had meant, she used one of the three spare bedrooms as an office and the other two were used for guests. Something made her turn instinctively to the bedroom closest to their master bedroom. Her heart skipped a beat when she opened the door.

Somehow, he'd managed to remove the queen bed without her knowledge and now in its place were a twin bed and a crib. Atop a new changing table lay two metal lock boxes, a teddy bear, and a toy helicopter. Elizabeth didn't even try to stop the tears. She inched closer and found one of the lock boxes had her name on it and the other- she somehow managed a laugh through her tears- was labeled Yoda.

They were both unlocked and grudgingly she began to sort through the contents of her own first. The first items she pulled were a will and power of attorney. She flinched and stuffed them back inside without reading them. The third item was a deed. To this house. Trying to clamp her jaw shut, she noticed the note attached. When she spotted his handwriting again she couldn't still her body from quaking with silent sobs.

"_We don't have to live here when we retire- or are retired- from Atlantis. But whenever we're on leave I want our family to come home to just that- a home. _ Our_ home." _

Elizabeth noted the date on the deed. John had purchased the home months ago. Confusion helped to quell her sobs somewhat and she reluctantly pulled open the baby's lockbox. John had established a trust and a college fund. She found a medal and almost smiled when she found an award from high school labeled "Class Clown". There was a picture of him and his Atlantian team mates. Then she pulled the letter he'd written to his unborn child. She scanned the first few lines and slumped to the floor as she read the next few. _"There is no one else in the universe like your mother. You need to know how amazing she is-"_

The letter fell to the floor and she watched her tears begin to dampen the ink. She wiped away the tears fruitlessly; finally she pushed the letter away before she ruined it completely.

"John how, when did you do this?" Elizabeth's eyes drifted towards the ceiling.

_Why_ is what she really wanted to know. His were not the actions of a man who was confident he would be returning to her. Her chest constricted painfully and she was barely aware of Jen stroking her hair or Carolyn softly talking to her and trying to calm her.

"Elizabeth, may I come in?" Dave's voice seemed warbled from the doorway. "I spoke with John yesterday; he wanted me to know he was leaving these for you. It's been bothering me ever since, it's why I convinced Dad to fly out today not that it was a hard sell. I didn't want you to be alone for long if you found it; I had a pretty good idea how bad it would look. But I had no idea this mission would end badly, and I honestly doubt he did either, or that you would find it under these circumstances."

She turned away, unwilling to let him see her distraught. Assuming he knew enough by now, she still wanted to be strong, wield the resilience she had mastered on Atlantis.

"Elizabeth, John did this months ago. He asked me to contact our family attorney the day you found out about the baby. " Dave drew closer and sat down in the floor opposite Elizabeth. "He didn't want you to know then, didn't want to frighten you, but I can tell you he was hell bent on making sure you and the baby would never have to worry about anything if something happened to him. It was almost funny in a twisted kind of way, I have a good idea that when an Air Force Colonel can't disclose their job duties to their family, it's pretty obvious he's into some pretty dangerous shit. But John, he laughed at me. He wasn't worried about missions it was more like getting hit by a runaway bus on the way home. He kept talking about how inefficient and dangerous roads and highways were for a nationwide transportation system."

"Dave, it's so much. This house, a college fund and a trust." Elizabeth's voice was choked.

Dave raised his eyebrows. "Did you even bother to read his will? I don't know what John told you, but our father has done well for himself. Done well for himself with the money his father left _him_. That's his money. Our grandfather set up similarly generous trusts and college accounts for all of his grandchildren. John's never touched any of it, at least not until he bought this house."

"Well, I don't want it. I don't need it." Her voice faltered. "All I need is him."

Dave wrapped an arm around her and pulled her tight. As her head fell upon his shoulder Dave spoke again. "Elizabeth, if your friends have anything to say about it, I think your wish- all our wishes- will come true. When you're ready, they are waiting for you downstairs. Daniel seems to think you can help. Elizabeth, I know you work with John but you've both been quite vague. What exactly do you do?"

Elizabeth allowed Jen to pull her to a standing position. She looked Dave straight in the eyes as she wiped the fading moisture from her eyes. "I'm supposed to be the strong one. There are rumors where John and I are stationed that it is by my sheer will alone that he has survived this long. If there is any remote chance that is true, I can't let them down now."

"Elizabeth you will only let them down if you choose to carry this pain alone. There are others who…" Dave's eyes fell to study the floor. "It would help them to share this with you, to support you while you support them."

"Share in their strength and …their wisdom? That sounds like advice a dear friend of ours would give."

Elizabeth's heart plummeted even further as she headed for the door; she would have to tell John's teammate's if they didn't find him before Atlantis dialed in next morning. Somehow she kept walking; she knew she needed to change clothes if she was heading to the SGC. She turned her head back before she exited the room. "Dave? Thank you."

He nodded sadly in response, his head falling downward once again. Elizabeth's gut coiled. She was the one who had pressed John to go to Atlantis. How many times had he risked his life since placing his trust in her and following her through the gate? The wave of guilt rushed to a crescendo within her. The baby began jabbing at her ribs, most likely in response to the adrenaline pumping through her body. Walking through the doorway, she began breathing deeply, trying to calm herself- and her child as she entered the master bedroom.

Elizabeth quickly changed into a pair of slacks with a waistband that thankfully hit below her distended stomach. She had no choice but to tug on one of John's button down dress shirts to complete a semblance of an outfit. It wasn't the professional image she was used to projecting, but it would suffice.

A few minutes later, she entered the living room toting a bag with a few essentials and a few more scrapped together outfits. She had no intention of returning to this house without John. Her mother was planning on staying at their house anyway; she would be there to look after Sedge for a few days.

Elizabeth knew the statistics. If it took them longer than that to find John….She shook her head, trying to force aside any doubts. She had to believe he was coming home. A smile hinted on her cheeks when the baby landed a surprisingly sharp kick against her ribs. Apparently, the baby agreed.

She was surprised to find just how subdued the occupants of the living room were when she entered the room. Apparently, they had all resolved to skillfully hide their fears from her. Immediately Elizabeth felt another wave of guilt; she'd been taken off guard when she'd learned of John's disappearance. She was still embarrassed she'd actually fainted. But they didn't need to pretend to protect her, didn't need to hide their feelings. Though they all seemed determined to try.

"Elizabeth I don't know if you're aware that Senator Sheppard has been recently appointed to a military oversight committee. An assignment he apparently requested. Getting the President's approval wasn't too difficult when he heard…" Jack scrunched his face uncomfortably. "Elizabeth, are you ready?"

She nodded wondering what all their family had been told.

"Senator, Dave, Mrs. Weir…any medical conditions that would interfere with…air travel?" Jack continued.

Elizabeth's eyebrow popped when she realized what he was up to. "Jack, that may be too much, it's too soon."

"No, we are all fine." Patrick answered firmly.

"Everyone, you'll have to get your cars later. Grab anything you can carry that you might need in the next few hours."

Catherine grabbed her purse without a second to spare.

"Novak, you have a go." Jack said.

A bone tingling minute later they'd all been transported and now stood at the bridge of the Deadalus. Patrick reached to steady her mother; Dave's steps were staggered as he approached the windows, his eyes wide in disbelief.

Caldwell cleared his throat. "Perhaps the coming conversation would be best-"

"I was thinking the observation deck." Jack said looking pointedly at Caldwell.

"Novak-"

"That's okay, I think we can walk." Elizabeth rushed forward watching a sheet of white pallor overtake her mother's face.

"Elizabeth are we-"

Elizabeth lightly hugged her mother. "Yes, let us explain-"

"And that's-"

Daniel cleared his throat before taking her mother's hand. "Earth, yes." He began to lead her into the corridor.

Elizabeth turned and touched her hand to Patrick's shoulder. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing escaped. "Patrick, that was my reaction the first time I was in space. Please come with us, we have a lot to explain and no time to waste."

Dave appeared on Patrick's left side looking equally bewildered but bravely putting his hand on his father's back urging him into motion.

They had all just reached the observation room when McKay crashed in. "Oh thank god." He grabbed Jennifer and squeezed her so hard she turned red from lack of air. He released her and handed a tablet to Elizabeth. "Elizabeth, I want you to read this. John wouldn't put this down all week; he was looking for something but didn't want to tell me what he suspected. I'm wondering if it had something to do with Jackson's theory, but I can't for the life of me figure out why John would be so quiet about it."

Daniel walked over to join them and Elizabeth glanced towards Jack.

"Go ahead; I'll try to go easy on them." Jack efficiently excused them.

Elizabeth found herself finally slipping back into command mode. She nodded crisply towards her mother and John's family. "I'll be back soon."

McKay led them down the hall to the science lab. Carter was inside frowning over a recording of MALP telemetry. He indicated a chair and Elizabeth gratefully sank down to study the tablet.

It didn't take long for her to dissect the first few pages of the text. "Oh my god." She whispered. "There were two kinds of replicators in this galaxy."

"I had been suspicious for a while, but it wasn't until we stumbled upon this text from the Antarctic outpost that I had any proof." Daniel didn't look very happy. "I really hoped that I was wrong."

"Why?" Elizabeth turned towards him. "Why would the Ancients have started experiments again once they fled to Earth? I knew that somehow the Milky Way replicators were different, created by someone called Reese an android-"

"Essentially it was the same theory; I don't think it would have taken long for the two groups to join together." Daniel strummed his fingers on the table. "I've asked Carter and McKay to verify if the equations and algorithms were compatible in the design and base code. So far, nothing has shown up that would have prevented a union."

"Why would they have targeted the Asgard?" Elizabeth frowned, in the original programming at least the Atlantian replicators were set to target the Wraith. Why the Asgard?

"Well I have a theory about that too. I've often wondered how the Asgard came to be. What we do know is the longer human's stay in space, stay in false gravity, the greater the atrophy of muscles. It's possible that the Asgard evolved from the Ancients. Thousands of years of living in space may have irrevocably altered their DNA and created the species we knew as the Asgard. If that were true, it would make sense then for the replicators to turn on them, much like they did the Lantians. Whatever they'd labeled them, it seems logical the Asgard would be viewed as the beloved offspring. Once again, the replicators found themselves the disfavored sibling." Daniel moved from the table towards the small windows in the lab.

His shoulders slumped suddenly. "Elizabeth, I think the information we need is here, but this script is an older Ancient dialect and I've been having troubles wading through it all. The Ancients' language evolved over time after they escaped back to Earth. I've seen this particular dialect before on Atlantis, but like I said, it's been very time intensive for me to translate. John didn't want me to ask for your help, he didn't want you to worry-"

Elizabeth puffed with indignation, rising to her feet she said, "That's no reason to exclude me-"

"I'm sorry Elizabeth, I honestly didn't think it would be anything _that_ important and I agreed with John. We shouldn't have tried to protect you just because …." Daniel straightened his glasses looking uncomfortable." It won't happen again."

She took a deep breath and allowed her frustration to fall away as she turned back towards the chair. Their intentions had been sincere even if they had been flawed. It was not the time to hold a grudge. "Okay. Give me a few minutes to review this data. John was worried and his Ancient is far from fluent. He must have found something…" Elizabeth voice trailed off as she settled in to study the tablet.

After about ten minutes, Jennifer entered the lab and dropped off a cup of tea before appropriating Elizabeth's arm to check her blood pressure and pulse.

"I'm fine Jen." Elizabeth managed a small smile. She was touched with how attentive Jen and Carolyn had been.

"I figured you'd say as much, but your mother would probably kick in the door if I don't return with some hard numbers. They're fine Elizabeth, take your time."

Elizabeth sighed as Jen left the room. Time was one thing she couldn't afford to waste.

She hadn't been entirely surprised to discover it had been Janus who restarted the replicators experiment. He was a good man, but he reminded her somewhat of McKay. They both had entirely too much confidence at times concerning their odds of success and failed to acknowledge there were some things that would always be beyond their control. One section of his notes puzzled her, Janus' writing was cryptic; it seemed to be a sort of code or shorthand he'd devised probably to keep other Ancients from realizing what he was up to. He'd gone through the Stargate and established a base on a planet at the outermost fringe of the Milky Way galaxy. That was the planet where John had gone missing. She read on.

"Wraith!" Elizabeth breathed suddenly; the baby kicked painfully beneath her ribs, most likely sensing her continued distraught. "The Wraith found them."

"What? Wraith?" McKay seemed to squeak more than speak.

"Janus used some sort of code throughout his notes, but yes, I believe a small regiment of Wraith somehow found their way to this galaxy. Seems as though it was about ten years after they abandoned Atlantis."

"It would be a long shot…and they would have had to have information from someone. Maybe one of the Ancients they fed upon? It's possible though with their technology and the knowledge of how to get here- ten years…" McKay fell deep into thought.

After a moment his head popped up and he began snapping his fingers rapidly. "The Wraith found their way here, but never found Earth. They've probably been in hibernation just like they were in Pegasus."

"And the last mission?" Elizabeth asked dreading the answer.

"Ah, well, we may have taken something from that planet that could have alerted them, even woken them. Something that would have protected the Ancients working there."

"A ZPM." Elizabeth gasped, "Rodney you didn't!"

"It was an uninhabited planet; they didn't need a force field!" McKay was gearing up for full dramatics when he started to pace jabbing his finger in the air. "Besides, it wasn't my discovery _and_- it wasn't my idea to take it. That was Landry's order. He wanted to get us all back to Atlantis ASAP and with the ZPM-"

"We can add it to the SGC's power grid and dial Atlantis from Earth with enough power to send more than just a message." Elizabeth's heart sank as she realized what they had done. They could have awakened Wraith in the Milky Way galaxy. John could- She started pointing at a section in the Ancient script. "Rodney- gate addresses. I think this is the last known location of the Wraith that made their way here."

"Figured it out?" Jack had entered the room. "I've got your family up to speed. We're all beaming down to the SGC, Carter and McKay, you're coming too."

A minute later they stood in the Gate room. Elizabeth's mother grabbed her hugging her fiercely. "My god Elizabeth, I had no idea what you'd gotten yourself into."

"Elizabeth, John-"Patrick turned his head for a minute as he gathered his thoughts. "Has he really done all that General O'Neill said?"

"And then some." Elizabeth said, surprised at the strength in her voice.

The next glimpse Elizabeth had of Patrick was when they had rematerialized in the Gate room of the SGC. She quickly glanced to her mother but before she could speak O'Neill interrupted.

"Ready Elizabeth? Time for goodbyes." O'Neill said.

Elizabeth's heart froze as she realized his intentions. "Jack….No. Don't make me do this. They said I could help."

"And you did. They wanted someone else fluent in ancient to confirm what Daniel had finally surmised. You gave them that and more. We have the gate addresses now; we have a place to start." Jack bit his lip when Carter entered the room with glowering eyes, but he soon managed the courage to speak again. "Dr. Keller, Dr. McKay grab what you need, you have five minutes until you return to Atlantis."

Carter's eyes had widened from his words. "Jack, you can't ask her to do this."

"And what do you think the IOA would say? The President? We have the ZPM, they don't have to wait for the Deadalus. "Jack sighed looking tired suddenly. "Elizabeth, what do you think Sheppard would want?"

The baby kicked again and Elizabeth winced. She would rather be fed to a Wraith then leave without him. To be so far away, unable to help with the search; it was unfathomable. Yet, she knew John would want her to go to Atlantis, he'd want her there watching over his team, watching over their home. Her mother and John's father were looking at her wide eyed probably wondering if she was insane, if they even realized what Jack was asking of her.

"If I go, McKay has to stay. " Her voice was so calm and collected she could hardly recognize it.

"Done." Jack said, not missing a beat. "Keller, you ready?"

"Hey wait just a minute!" Rodney protested.

"Rodney…John…" Elizabeth couldn't finish, but as she watched Rodney's eyes, she knew he understood. "Transmit anything to me you want translated, I'll take this tablet and keep digging through it, I'll see if I can find any additional gate addresses mentioned for the Wraith or the replicators. I'll check in as Atlantis has since we were stranded, three times a day, but if you learn-"

"We'll contact you immediately Elizabeth, you have my word." Cameron emerged from the shadows. "If we find anything or piece any theory together- you will be the next to know."

She grabbed her mother and hugged her fiercely. In turn, she then hugged Patrick and Dave. "I am so sorry, but I have to. The SGC, I, we will keep you posted. It will be much easier now-"

"What now that we know you are all officially insane?" Her mother's look of indignation could have set fire to the gate.

"Mother, you have to trust me. Trust them. Any of us would give our lives to bring him back. We'll find him, that is, if he doesn't find us first."

Walter's voice punctured the Gate room as the Stargate began humming to live. "Chevron one encoded."

Elizabeth tried not to look as Jen and Rodney said their goodbyes. Carolyn and Vala swarmed hugging Elizabeth and vowing to take care of Sedge and look after the house after her mother left.

Teal'c and Cameron approached her. "We will bring him home." Cameron cupped her chin. "You got to believe that Elizabeth."

"Chevron seven encoded."

Carolyn eased up on her side. "Listen to Jen; take care of yourself- and that baby." With a light hug, Carolyn retreated to Cameron's side.

Elizabeth looked at Cameron. "John has an unusual way of finding his way home Cam. Be watching, his signals are often confused for the enemy, I'd hate-"

"Elizabeth, I've read the Atlantis mission reports. I know how Sheppard operates. We won't get in his way."

"Chevron eight….locked."

Her mother and Patrick jumped backwards as the gate kawhooshed to life. Elizabeth looked around at all those assembled before her, blinking tears away from her eyes. "Mother, I'm sorry. I have to go. Please look after Sedge for me, close up the house if-"

"Elizabeth, it's time." Jack squeezed her shoulder. "We'll bring him home."

Elizabeth's face scrunched uncomfortably. "You'd better."

Jennifer had tears in her eyes when she grasped Elizabeth's hand. Elizabeth squeezed her hand in return before clamping her eyes shut. Together, they crossed the event horizon.

Seconds later Teyla and Ronan were practically crushing them both in embrace as they welcomed them home. Teyla's hands freely roamed her stomach after releasing Elizabeth from the fierce hug.

"Elizabeth, it is so different to see this in person. I've watched your child grow through the video transmit, but this-"Teyla's eyes widened as the gate suddenly shut down.

"Where is Dr. McKay? Col. Sheppard?" Teyla's head cocked quizzically.

Elizabeth looked at Jen who'd just been freed from Ronan's embrace. Neither woman managed to answer and against her will, tears started flowing from her eyes.

Ronan pulled his gun from the holster, he sneered while spinning it before locking it into position. He walked up to the Stargate before glancing back over his shoulder. "Where do you need me?"

A/N: Sorry for the long delay and thanks for taking the time to read this chapter. Apologies for any grammatical errors, I self edit and have not given this one the time I normally do to check for errors.

Bear with me- if you've read my other stories, you should know my track record by now and my MO for endings. I know I've stated this before; some of our desires to keep this couple happy- and together- can be quite frightening. That's a pretty powerful incentive for me to make all this right in the end. But- you'll have to keep following to find out what's in store for them Sign up for story alerts and be the first to know when the next chapter hits. Sadly, this story is nearing the end- a few more chapters and finished before the year is out. I've enjoyed it so much; I hope you have as well. Thanks to all who have taken the time to leave reviews, if I haven't thanked you personally yet- they are coming. Now, back to the drawing board ya'll; see you out there!


	10. Chapter 10

Six weeks later-

Elizabeth's thoughts were near incoherent as the hour drew to a close. John would be returning to them in minutes, though her heart panged painfully as she considered the coming reunion. He'd been found, amazingly since he was found on a planet the SG1 had never visited. He was unharmed, physically anyway. He had no idea what had happened or where he had been. Landry had finally allowed John to return to Atlantis only after insistent pressure from O'Neill. Whatever John had suffered on that mission had cost him. When SG1 rescued him they discovered John had no memories of anything that had happened beyond the first month in Atlantis.

Teyla stood alone in the gate room awaiting John. Elizabeth fought to shed the wave of jealousy that flowed suddenly over her. Serene, strong and lovely Teyla. John would most likely remember more of his feelings of _that _friendship then the one he'd slowly nutured with Elizabeth.

Elizabeth's hands roamed across her stomach that stretched painfully full with the child that grew within. The child John had no memory of, the product of a love he had no memory of. Tears burned the corners of her eyes and she refused to brush them away as they fell. All the medical advice didn't change the fact that what they were asking her to do hurt. Horribly.

The baby kicked and Elizabeth sighed as she rubbed her sore and swollen stomach. A firm steady arm stretched somewhat awkwardly about her shoulder. She drew upon his strength forcing herself to acknowledge that losing John was not permanent. Elizabeth would never accept that. He would remember when he saw her carrying their child. _He had to_.

"You okay?"

Ronon's gruff voice was oddly comforting. As was his arm still tense and hesitant around her. That the only thing she had gained through this nightmare. Ronon had seemed to assume responsibility for keeping her safe- and sane while John had been missing. He'd become the terrifying overbearing brother she'd never had. There was no chance of her skipping meals with Ronon looming over her frowning.

Elizabeth dared to glance briefly at Ronon when he pulled his arm away and leaned forward bracing his upper body with a firm grasp on the railing. His face was unreadable but Elizabeth sensed the tension within him as he stretched out looking down at the gate room below. Her teeth pressed sharply against her bottom lip. John wouldn't even know Ronon. Per Jennifer's orders, he stood with her now on the balcony above the gate room, awaiting John's arrival. It probably _was_ a good idea to have a back up if her self control failed. Her eyes pressed shut and she envisioned the homecoming she really wanted to give John- she'd waddle down the stairs as quickly and gracefully as she could manage before kissing him breathless. But she'd been strongly advised to avoid doing just that. They didn't want his memories to be filled in artificially or for John to be pushed to remember. John was to be eased back in to the fold of Atlantis and if all went as planned, Jennifer hoped his memories would begin to return just as gently.

Elizabeth turned away from the Stargate towards the control room. The smells of Thanksgiving and succulently roasting turkeys had just begun to fade in the past day. John would have been drooling over the scent, thoughts of the most perfect turkey sandwich tantalizing him. But he'd missed it. He'd missed the teams that had begun dragging in any kind of greenery that resembled evergreen and the frenzied decorating that accompanied it. There was no balcony, railing or door frame that remained untouched by the feverish Christmas spirit that had infected the crew at the close of Thanksgiving. In a time of darkness, it was a hope that they had all fiercely grasped hold of.

Looking up she smiled softly through her tears. Something resembling mistletoe draped nearly every doorway in Atlantis. Her heart did a little flip flop each time she crossed a threshold imagining the many ways John would delight in taking advantage of _that _little holiday festivity. That was, if his memories returned before the holiday season ended. Tears again began burning wider trails down her cheeks.

Jennifer emerged from the shadows to join Ronon on the balcony. It had been six weeks since they'd left earth without McKay; Elizabeth understood all too well how much they would have missed each other. But tonight, _they_ at least would be able to hold each other. Odds were quite likely she'd still be sleeping alone in the agonizingly large bed in the new suite of rooms Teyla had prepared for her and John. It was a suite meant for a family. Elizabeth prayed that her family was not yet beyond repair.

The gate jumped to life and Elizabeth hurried back to Ronon's side. A warm reassuring hand rested against her lower back. She turned to Ronon and his other hand rose to brush away her tears that had not ceased streaming. At that moment, John jauntily strode through the gate immediately looking up to the balcony. Her breath hitched when he pinned her with a questioning gaze. _Who is that man?_ But there was no anger, no jealousy within John's eyes. John nodded his head in greeting and turned his attention and focus towards Teyla.

McKay had already clambered up the stairs and was dragging Jennifer into his arms.

"Where's Ford?" John's voice drifted upwards. His tone indicated he already suspected he would not be pleased with the answer.

Elizabeth felt as though the floor had begun swirling beneath her feet. She wanted to hold him so desperately but he didn't remember. _He didn't remember._ A crushing pain tore through her chest and she could hardly breathe. Tears fell harder as she watched Jennifer clutch Rodney tightly. She knew it would make it worse, but she couldn't stop her eyes from straying back to John. She saw his forehead gently press against Teyla's as he held her arms. A ragged cry escaped her lips; she needed to escape this pain. Her knees buckled before blessed darkness came angrily crashing down over her eyes.

A commotion above drove John apart from Teyla. His eyes immediately darted to the balcony. His feet were in motion before he was even sure there was danger. Something coursing through his veins seemed to demand the response. His footsteps pounded up the stairs and he heard shouts that seemed dim and distant. _Protect Elizabeth_ was the only coherent thought he could focus on.

He shook his head as he closed in. The damn cave man had scooped Elizabeth up in his arms.

A rising irritation threatened to overtake him. He wasn't even sure why the caveman irritated him so badly. It started as soon as John stepped through the Stargate, he spotted them outside the control room and it appeared as though the man had just been moving a straying hair from her face. John had also clearly seen that the man's arm extended behind her back. He seemed a little too familiar with Elizabeth and for some unknown reason it seriously pissed John off.

_Focus Sheppard!_ John tried to gather his fragmenting thoughts together. Keller was now fussing around with Elizabeth's wrist and they appeared to be moving towards him. Towards the infirmary he realized.

"Hold up Chewie, what's going on?" John's head snapped up somewhat surprised at how easy that nickname had slipped out. It seemed familiar somehow. He quickly took in the massive man with the crazy dreadlocks. He could think of a lot of other more appropriate names, but…slowly it occurred to him that Chewie was the perfect name for the creature that had Elizabeth tucked into his arms like she was a rag doll.

"Elizabeth," John's voice sounded deep and raspy in his ears. He felt a fear flooding his heart that he didn't understand and a wave of tenderness and concern almost took his breath away.

"She'll be fine John; Jen just wants to get her to the infirmary to check the baby." Rodney said as he breezed by.

John did a double take when he turned back to Chewie and Elizabeth. Her eyes were blinking slowly as she returned to consciousness. John quickly moved around to their side and his jaw dropped when he got his first glimpse of Elizabeth's obviously pregnant stomach. The caveman had obviously obstructed his view her from the gate room floor. His head jerked back and forth between that man and Elizabeth in wonder and…something that felt surprisingly like hurt.

"You…and him? A baby?" His eyes turned down.

When he glanced back up Elizabeth had begun shaking violently and had tucked herself even deeper into Chewie's arms. The man practically growled at John as if he had somehow upset her.

"Let's go Ronon." Jennifer tugged them back into motion.

Ronon. John stood aside watching as the group hurried along to the infirmary not even noticing he hadn't followed. John didn't want to like that man; for some reason seeing them together had felt like a swift kick to the gut. Yet, he found himself instinctively liking him anyway. He'd seen how protective he was of Elizabeth and how angry he'd been at John for whatever he'd done to upset her.

John ran his hands haphazardly through his hair and moved to the balcony where Elizabeth always waited. Today, she hadn't waited alone. He felt his face scrunch with frustration and he aimlessly kicked the railing. It was killing him that he had apparently lost years worth of memories. Something was coiling uncomfortably in his gut. There was something big they hadn't told him. Something besides Ford. His scowl deepened. He had a feeling he'd better figure it out soon or that it would all somehow manage to slip through his fingers.

A/N: Thank you so very much for all of you who took the time to review. It makes my day to hear your kind words and see notices of those who signed up for story alerts. I hope you continue to follow and enjoy. You know it's a given the next chapter will be up soon- my favorite couple has a very special delivery coming!


	11. Chapter 11

John had always been a good soldier when it came to sleep. It had been easy for him to assimilate to catching a quick few minutes of shut eye where he could grab it and waking up fully alert ready for anything. He had never been a dreamer. Not until Mitchell's team had pulled his scruffy scraggly self from that godforsaken planet. Now he didn't even have to be asleep to feel like he was dreaming. There was something so close; he could almost smell the scent of a woman's shampoo dusting against his nose. And when he dared try to sleep, his body remembered what his mind could not. He only slept on one side of the bed, no matter how small the mattress had been in whatever quarters he'd crashed in for the night. When he woke his arm was always stretched out as though searching for someone.

He absentmindedly rubbed his throbbing head. Everything he couldn't remember seemed to be pounding at his brain just waiting to break through. He'd noted the haunted eyes of so many of those he passed in the halls of Atlantis, he wasn't entirely sure he wanted to remember all the terrors. Since his rescue, he'd discovered numerous scars marring his skin he didn't remember; he was well aware his time on Atlantis hadn't all been fun and games. The gray threading through his hair alone was a testament to the burden he'd carried.

Sparing with Teyla was the first thing that came to mind when he tried to avoid sleeping, but he hadn't been able to find her. Everyone else seemed to be acting a little odd around him. Restlessly he plopped back into his bed and set his internal alarm for 5:30 am. Enough time for a nice run and breakfast before reporting to the morning briefing. Shrugging off that nagging feeling of worry that had mounted with each minute he'd spent in Atlantis, he nestled deeper into his bed. He shut his eyes and forced all the tumultuous thoughts in his head to take a break for the night.

That night his sleep was again haunted by hazy foggy dreams. He could feel the press of skin against his chest, the tickling sensations of hair dancing about his neck. He'd wake convinced he'd pinned the women within his grasp only to find the damned pillow crumbling beneath his fingers. He turned and was treated to the soft sexy sound of a woman's laughter dancing against his ear. He tossed again determined to force the memories to return but he awoke the next morning not being able to remember any more dreams, though the image of his mother's wedding ring oddly was streaming through his mind.

His solitary morning run wasn't enough to burn away his frustrations. He plunked down a plate of unappetizing food he didn't remember gathering at an empty table in the cafeteria. Sipping coffee he didn't remember pouring, Rodney's voice grated harshly against his ear.

"You look like hell Sheppard, what did you do last night?"

John only growled in response.

"John seriously what is going on? Are you starting to remember because-"

"No McKay, I _don't_ remember and don't understand why no one will tell me a damn thing! If I was an ass to everyone the past few years, well then I'm sorry. But I deserve to know." John slammed a fist down on the table and suddenly every set of eyes in the cafeteria were on him.

"McKay…" He paused until eyes started diverting and deliberately lowered his voice a few notches. "Was I _with _someone before?"

John remembered enough to realize that McKay falling silent wasn't normal. John was getting close to something.

"John, Jennifer and Carolyn agree with the psychiatrist back at the SGC. There are a few key elements to your life that they have specifically asked us not to discuss with you, they think placing you here will force out the memories naturally and be easier."

"This is _not_ easy Rodney. Everyone is looking at me like I have a disease." John hissed quietly. "I… I still can't believe we lost Carson."

The mention of Caron's name seemed to break him. McKay abandoned his plate of food and jumped to his feet. "If you haven't noticed, _this_ isn't easy for anyone. Certain people in particular have been very hurt by following the doctor's orders. Open up your eyes and stop being so stupid. If you were involved with someone and they weren't supposed to talk to you about it, weren't allowed to run to you and welcome you home after they've been sick with worry for weeks, how do you think they feel right now? The rest of us have to watch her suffer and she does not deserve that! There has been too much suffering here already."

John also remembered enough to know that McKay abandoning food was not normal. He was truly upset and that surprised John. There was obviously more to McKay than he'd realized before. John stood and quickly headed for the door. McKay was close on his heels as he practically ran for the door.

"John wait!" McKay was already breathless as he tugged on John's sleeve. "Where are you going?"

John started to rattle off a choice remark but thought better of it and bit down harshly on his lip. Through clenched teeth he managed to speak. "Rodney, tell them I'm taking a sick day." John spun on his heel and headed back towards his quarters.

"You're…_what?_" Rodney sprinted towards John. "Well you can't! Elizabeth already beat you too it."

A look of horror crossed Rodney's face and John's jaw dropped. Did he mean…

"And…and…and, well you know if she is off duty technically Atlantis is in your hands. You can't take the day off."

"OK, so Elizabeth get's to stay in bed all day with the caveman doting over her- where does that leave me Rodney? I can't go into that meeting, I can't even walk to the jumper bay now without the possibility of walking by or talking to somebody I was…I can't do that, can't hurt them because I can't remember." John took off again.

He still couldn't shake the feeling of just being pissed off in general when he thought of Elizabeth with that man, though he knew it wasn't any of his business. McKay's jaw started rapidly opening and shutting like a guppy; he looked like he'd taken a kick to the gut, no words were escaping his mouth. John didn't have time for this. John turned and took a few more steps before stopping. He spun around to discover Rodney flailing his arms wildly as he tried to keep from crashing into John. John placed his hand firmly against his chest stopping him cold.

"Tell them I won't do it. The can send food to my quarters if they don't want me to starve, but otherwise I'm not leaving that room. I'm not going to be their damn science experiment and I won't let anyone get hurt because I participate in whosever game this is. Someone had better start talking fast. One thing I do remember- Atlantis likes me, likes my gene. I'd bet there is a lot of trouble I could get into…"John smiled at the look of sheer horror that covered Rodney's face when he walked away.

_Eight hours later…_

"What do you mean you…_can't… find him_?" The blood flowing through Elizabeth's veins seemed to freeze with the icy cold of fear. "Rodney! We just got him back- and you _lost him_?"

"Hey! I did not lose him! He said he wasn't leaving his quarters, I just went to take him dinner- I was _not_ in charge of guarding his door!" Rodney threw an exasperated frown towards Lorne.

"Dr. Weir, I've had a man on his door all day, he didn't leave his room." Lorne was glaring fiercely at Rodney. "And may I remind you, we never had visual confirmation of Sheppard going into his room. If I've wasted manpower guarding an empty room all day McKay I swear-"

"Gentlemen!" Elizabeth rubbed her temples praying her head wouldn't explode. "It doesn't matter now. Find him. _Quickly_. Imagine how you would feel if you starting getting flashes of terrible memories- you know what he's been through, he can't be alone if that happens. Call Ronon and Teyla to assist with the search."

Lorne and McKay fell silent. They each knew if Elizabeth was pissed that Ronon and Teyla would be beyond furious. Elizabeth sighed deeply pondering the threat John had made to Rodney earlier_. Be patient my sweet; please, please, please don't break Atlantis_. Because if anyone ever deserved a temper tantrum it would be John tonight. Elizabeth was heartbroken over John's easy dismissal of her upon his arrival. But she was furious at herself for allowing this pretence to go so far. She'd put her health, her child's health at risk. Biting down fiercely on her lower lip she prayed that John would remember soon. Because if he didn't, how would he ever forgive her?

_Midnight…_

"You need to sleep Elizabeth, I promise to contact you as soon as he's located."

"Teyla, I can't and you know it."

Elizabeth was standing on the balcony outside her office, reveling that the air was so mild. It was the first week in December and the air caressed her face like the softest and most luxurious sheet she'd ever encountered. It would be a perfect night for her to be tucked under John's arm in the hammock on the porch of their house. A perfect night to sleep under the stars. Hell who was she kidding? She'd camp out in a hail storm about now if she could only be within his arms.

"Your old quarters then. They are still assigned to you, there is actually a lot of your and John's belongings being stored there. You can lie down, take a quick nap and if anything turns up you will be much closer to the Control Room." Worry lay heavy upon Teyla's eyes.

Elizabeth took a deep breath. It would do no good to argue and her body was beyond fatigued. Sleep had not come gently to her the past six weeks and the past few nights she had hardly slept at all. She nodded her head and grudgingly headed towards her old quarters. Tiptoeing carefully around storage boxes Elizabeth entered the room without raising the lights. The soft glow of the moon granted enough patches of lights for her to easily reach the bed. She rolled her eyes as she automatically moved to _her_ side of the bed. Odd it was so rumpled, but she was so tired she simply sank into the bed lying on her side. John's cologne lingered in the air. It must be from his clothes, Teyla had said some of his belongings were stored here. If she had one more ounce of energy to spare she would have prowled for a soft shirt of his to sleep in. Instead she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, drawing in his scent.

_Control room…_

"I don't know Teyla, we've looked everywhere." Rodney was tired and frustrated and he needed to get some food soon or he was going to faint- err pass out.

Zelenka ran his hands through his hair. "I thought we had him earlier, I found a life sign in Elizabeth's quarters."

"But I informed Dr. Zelenka that Elizabeth had just retired to those quarters for a short rest." Teyla said before looking at him expectantly.

Spotting a plate of something looking suspiciously like donuts his stomach audibly growled and he headed towards Zelenka. "Let me take a look at that."

Snatching a donut and ignoring the following protests he plopped down and began studying the monitor. "This is great!" His taste buds were bursting with pleasure as he mumbled through his bite.

"Rodney, I don't know what you think you will find." Zelenka muttered a grabbed his coffee just a second before it reached Rodney's lips.

"That's odd." He tucked his head closer to the screen. "Hmm. Nope, nothing."

"No wait!" Zelenka pushed his glasses up further on his nose. "There, just there!"

For a moment the one blip in Elizabeth's quarters became two before quickly merging back together. Rodney and Zelenka pulled away from the screen both smiling broader than they had since John had gone missing the first time.

"Did you find something?" Teyla's eyebrow arched hopefully.

"Yes, yes, yes we did indeed." Rodney started snapping his fingers towards Zelenka. "Got any more of those donuts? Teyla, where's Ronon? It's time for a stake out!"

_Elizabeth's old quarters…._

Elizabeth's eyes hadn't been closed for a minute when her heart jarred. The bed dipped with motion and suddenly a strong arm swept around her pulling her close against a man's chest.

"Lizabeth, you shouldn't work so late." John's sleepy muffled voice drifted hot against her ear. His hand traced a lazy path down her arm before his fingers rubbed against her ring finger. "Something's missing…"

He shouldn't be here, _she _shouldn't have been here. But somehow, they had found each other. The air around her instantly warmed and her skin sizzled from the sheer simple pleasure of his body pressed firmly against her back. His fingers laced lazily through her own and she fought the urge to grasp them, to turn and grab him fiercely and never let him go. But she didn't dare. Her heart was beating so rapidly she was afraid he'd feel it, hear it and she'd break this magical spell.

She hadn't missed the confusion in his last words. Like he was trying to remember. The ring was only missing from her finger because Jennifer had bribed her with chocolate to remove it for John's return; well chocolate and piles of studies and mountains of medical advice. Three days. That was all she'd agreed too. Three days and if John hadn't gained his memory they would begin filling in the gaps. Elizabeth felt the baby moving beneath her tight stomach. She prayed he'd forgive her. Prayed the memories would come rushing back.

A gasp of air escaped her lungs when John's breathing pattern slowed a moment later. Elizabeth fought to get her body to relax and to keep tears from flowing. If she cried her body would shake and she wouldn't dare wake him now. She wasn't sure he remembered, his doctors had mentioned instances of sleep walking since he'd been rescued. If he woke tomorrow with no memory, she was going to be damn sure she enjoyed every minute until he broke her heart again.

A/N: I'm hoping these two will have a very merry little Christmas- how 'bout you? If you still feel the love, be sure to sign up for Story Alerts. It's Christmas after all and I have a horrible weakness for eggnog and bliss this time of year! And BTW I can't for the life of me get paragraph breaks to stay during the uploading process. Hence the choppy- _Control room, Elizabeth's old quarters_ breaks. I know many of you who read also write…so share the love and tell me how the heck you do it. Pretty please


	12. Chapter 12

The next morning…

"Mmm." A soft moan breezed past Elizabeth's lips; a wall of hot muscle tightened within her arms. John's fingers began lazily threading through her hair drawing the strands away from her face.

_Oh damn._ Elizabeth caught her bottom lip between her teeth. Apparently her subconscious didn't have quite the self control she'd expected it to. She had turned in her sleep drawing him within her arms. Elizabeth took advantage of John's last moments of sleepiness to dip her head against his chest allowing her long curls to veil her face.

"Good morning…sleepy head." John's voice was laden with confusion. He began smoothing her hair back with more vigor, clearly anxious to discover who lay beneath.

Elizabeth rolled away pulling the sheet along with her. It wasn't for modestly, she was still fully dressed. The sheet was a pitiful attempt to shield her from the coming pain. With her back towards John she sat up as gracefully as possible allowing her feet to fall off the bed and onto the floor. She edged forward shoving her feet into the shoes she'd abandoned near the bed. She heaved herself onto her feet, the silence pricking uncomfortably against her skin. She_ hated_ this. If John still didn't remember, Elizabeth mused perhaps there was another way to nudge his memories along.

She steeled herself and glanced back over her shoulder, locking onto John's eyes.

"_Elizabeth?"_ John's eyes stretched wide with shock.

She turned to face him. "Something wrong John? Expecting someone…thinner?" She lightly teased. Her voice was still husky with sleep; there was no way to hide the hunger that filled her eyes.

John was on his side, his upper body propped by his elbow. His head rested atop his hand while he studied her intently. His hair was wild, his face stubbly, and Elizabeth felt a delicious little shiver run down her spine. She surveyed John's scruffy head that she so adored, absentmindedly licking her lips as her eyes lingered across the vast expanse of skin his boxer clad body treated her to.

"_Elizabeth!" _His eyebrow's popped and that cocky grin she remembered from the first days of the expedition spread proudly across his face. John's voice was raspy and sexy as hell with the fatigue that clearly still hung over his body.

"I wouldn't look so smug just yet." Elizabeth's voice carried a bit more warning than she'd intended and John's body instantly rippled with tension.

John jumped out of bed and shrugged on his shirt. His eyes darted around the room and anxiously back towards the door.

"Elizabeth, err, Dr. Weir….oh crap." John snatched his pants and stumbled over his shoes. Still off balance, he started hopping in a circle trying to finish tugging on the pants. "I've been, well they said sleepwalking and…damn it!"

The back of his legs struck the nearby chair sending John spiraling awkwardly towards the floor before disappearing behind the bed. The thud and grunt that coincided with his disappearance made Elizabeth wince.

Elizabeth peered closer just as his head poked back above the bed. "I don't know how I ended up here. Ronon is going to kill me isn't he?" His forehead crinkled atop a growing scowl.

Elizabeth moved towards him feeling guilty as hell that she found John's current confusion just the tiniest bit amusing. Placing her hands on his arms she nudged him towards his feet. "Easy John, Ronon isn't going to kill you. Though he's liable to make you spar with him soon; that hasn't always worked so well for you in the past."

He edged closer, the questioning look in John's eyes tugged at her heart and she couldn't resist trailing her fingers down his face. Sighing wistfully she turned away and took a step towards the door, glancing back only when he spoke again.

"Is that my shirt?" An odd mixture of bewilderment and pride crept across his face and his shoulders visibly relaxed.

Elizabeth turned slowly, smoothing the white button down shirt she'd appropriated from his closet before she'd left Earth. "It's only fair John, after all…it's all _your _fault that none of my clothes fit. " Her voice silkily teasing as her hands traced the outline of her bulging stomach.

"_Eliz…abeth." _His voice drawled intoxicatingly, turning a word as simple as her name into something more dangerous with the underlying hint of desire.

Warmth seeped through Elizabeth; she had been wrong. From the very first days of the expedition when she thought she'd been crazy, he _had_ been flirting with her. She wondered how much further she could safely push him, he was so close to remembering, she could feel it in the way his eyes pored over her. Elizabeth tugged the engagement ring from her pants pocket.

The smirk fell from his face and Elizabeth spotted a flash of trepidation. "That's was my mother's…"

"Yes." Elizabeth pushed the ring firmly back on her finger with a look she hoped conveyed that she had no intentions of taking it off anytime soon.

"Why can't I remember?" His face scrunched and he turned away from her cursing softly under his breath. She could almost see the muscles rippling with tension beneath his skin. "I want to remember Elizabeth." His voice was barely more than a ragged whisper.

Easing up behind him she touched his shoulder. She gingerly moved before him and took his hand. "And _we_ _need_ you to remember." She'd placed his hand on her stomach just as the baby landed a well timed kick.

The intensity that rose within John's eyes caused her breath to hitch. His eyes seared into hers and time seemed to freeze in that moment. She allowed every defense she had around her heart to fall away, granting him anything he was willing to take, to see, and feel as he clamped onto her eyes. Unaware she'd even been moving, her back brushed the wall. John's hands rose to her face, his fingers tunneling through her hair. She was incapable of doing anything but focusing on his eyes as his nose brushed hers.

Noise from the hallway starting grating at her ears but she didn't care. Something familiar was kindling in John's eyes and the tiny glimmer of hope it granted was like salve to her soul.

"Oh no! No, no, no, no, _No_!" McKay's voice was following by a crash and the sound of breaking glass.

John abruptly swiveled around shielding Elizabeth with his body.

"We were worried, we didn't mean to…" Teyla's voice trailed off.

"Oh god Elizabeth, I'm sorry, but we couldn't reach either of you on radio and…" McKay's eyes fell to the floor after spotting the single tear that had escaped Elizabeth's eye. "I'm sorry."

Ronon was studying the remains of the glass vase they'd knocked over when they'd obviously tried to retreat from the room. Elizabeth's hopes were plummeting. She had no idea just how that moment with John had occurred but she knew that temporary magic had just been swept away.

John tilted his head towards her. "I know we're consenting adults and everything, so why do I feel like our parents just busted us renting a hotel room after prom?"

Ronon shrugged holding a shattered fragment of the delicate glass. "What's prom?"

"That's odd. Kind of like déjà vu. This feels familiar." John peered out the corner of his eye towards Elizabeth.

Jennifer Keller swept into the room looking exasperated. "John, how am I supposed to treat you when I can't find you? It's time to talk a little walk to the infirmary."

"Yes, well don't take too long we have a staff meeting and –"Rodney's fingers were snapping as he prattled through the day's agenda.

Elizabeth tuned it all out. There was only one priority in her life right now, only one thing she could possible focus on. Her family, fractured as it may currently be.

"Hey…you okay Elizabeth?" John's head tilted toward her with concern.

Elizabeth just nodded, not trusting her voice.

"Sounds like a big day." John's voice dropped so only she could hear his words. "I want to talk to you Elizabeth, talk when we're both done for the day. With any luck we'll only be interrupted a few times instead of a few dozen. "

Elizabeth's heart rate increased with each second John whispered into her ear. "I have a late staff meeting tonight, I'll be in the conference room with several scientists who have been researching-"

"My head hurts enough as it is without the mention of research. Just promise me you'll meet me in your office 9:00?"

Elizabeth mutely nodded. John brought his hand up to cup her chin, holding her gaze for a second longer.

A small smile finally crept across John's face and he brushed his thumb across her cheek. "I'll be waiting for you."

Jennifer looked contrite when she pulled on John's elbow. "Sorry guys, but this is overdue. Come on John."

John was scrutinizing at Elizabeth's tear filled eyes and the crazy smile stretching across her face. "You sure you're ok?"

Nodding again Elizabeth squeezed his arm and made a beeline for the door before the tears started in earnest. Happy tears. So many things had conjured either John's or her own feelings of Déjà vu that morning; it made her feel that they were finally coming full circle. The baby kicked and Elizabeth smiled woefully. It was good timing Elizabeth mused, this child of hers and John's was quite active and energetic. They would have to start moving forward again- and quickly- or they would never keep up with this little one.

_A/N: _Thank you all for the wonderful reviews, hope you enjoyed this chapter. If you notice some familiar things, yes, I pulled just a few lines verbatim from the first chapters to kind of "hint" at John's memory being ready to return. Hope it didn't drive you crazy, but if it did, don't worry I don't really expect to use more in the next chap.

Ok, so now review, sign up for story alerts and wrap presents- _and -what?_ Ok, go buy presents, wrap presents, spike the eggnog, drink eggnog…Hope you are all off to a great start to this Holiday Season!


	13. Chapter 13

John couldn't remember a day that had stretched so painfully long since he'd escaped the clutches of the public school system. His head throbbed and he had tired long ago of everyone's careful handling of him. He felt much like a schoolboy, as though everyone around him was in a silent plot to keep him out of mischief. He'd finally escaped when Ronon turned his head towards a sound down the hallway. He wasn't exactly proud of the cowardly gesture, but Ronon had wanted to spar but he couldn't easily dismiss Elizabeth's humorous warning. Besides he was due a few minutes of time to try to process the turbulent emotions that rose whenever Elizabeth crossed his mind. It felt as though she was always there, always in his head…in his heart. He'd begun thinking that meeting her tonight was a bad idea considering his current state of utter confusion, but there was no way in hell he would leave her waiting.

He skirted through the hallways skittishly after showering and changing into street clothes. His skin was prickling uncomfortably and he had that gut feeling that something was wrong. The corridor seemed unusually dark and quiet as he approached the control room. Muffled voices drifted out of the conference room and one in particular sent John's heart rate accelerating though he couldn't say why exactly. Quickly pulling his sidearm out, he tucked against the wall taking soft but deliberate footsteps.

_Radim! _John hissed to himself recognizing one voice. The hiss turned to a growl when he couldn't remember who Radim was. But the cold fear and adrenaline rush that surged through his body was more than unpleasant. It was familiar. He turned and saw Elizabeth serene and safe exiting the conference room. Before he could feel any relief for her safety a hand landed on her arm pulling her to a stop.

"Ladon?" Elizabeth's voice carried softly.

John broke into a dead run, pulling his gun up praying he'd get a clean shot.

"John what are you doing!" Elizabeth's voice tore through his heart.

She didn't know, didn't realize the danger. Why did he?

Suddenly John felt like he'd slammed into a steel wall. Dreadlocks whipped against his face and John felt his arms immobilized. _Ronon! _He hadn't been here during the siege, he didn't know. John twisted his captor so fiercely he was fairly confident that he'd just dislocated his shoulder. But all he could focus on was Elizabeth's eyes. He slammed into the floor pulling Ronon along with him. His eyes were crossing while he fought to catch a glimpse of Elizabeth.

"Kolya." John's voice was ragged and tortured, even to himself.

Ronon jerked him pinning him more firmly to the floor. Flashes began streaming throughout John's thoughts and his head seized so painfully he would have prayed for unconsciousness to take him. But Elizabeth…

He could practically feel the rain continuing to pound down like icy needles upon already raw skin. Kolya coldly informing him to say goodbye. His muscles began contracting and relaxing rapidly and John realized he couldn't control his body.

"Oh my god." Elizabeth knelt by his side."He's having a seizure- call Keller! John, Radim is an ally now; he's been working with our scientists-"

The voices were falling away when John flashed upon the image of Kolya holding Elizabeth preparing to drag her through the Stargate.

"John, stay with me." Elizabeth voice carried as if it had travelled through a tunnel. He felt her hand on his forehead.

He managed to focus his eyes enough to see a medic arriving, he dropped a bag of supplies beside John the noise resonating reminding him of the last shot he had fired the day of the siege. Elizabeth had fallen. John's chest seized with pain and suddenly was gasping for air. He'd thought in that moment she'd been struck.

"John, stay with me." Elizabeth had his hand guiding it to her stomach. A resounding kick thudded against his hand. "Stay with us."

"Elizabe-"John couldn't finish, the medic strapped an oxygen mask around his mouth.

His eyes clamped shut and a tidal wave of pain ripped through his brain. It was like a slide show on speed, flashes of images of the past few years seared through burning away the clouds of dust that had seemingly blocked them. He felt the agony of a wraith feeding, relived the loss of Ford- again, and every other prickle of terror and pain he had endured. A sharp prick at his wrist began to dull the horrific memory flow. He finally felt his body relaxing slowly.

"I'm here John, _we're_ here with you. We won't leave your side." Elizabeth's voice wavered almost imperceptibly.

The dark that covered his eyes that time lulled him like his favorite cozy childhood quilt. The images this time were fewer, more far between the other memories. John was falling towards a drug induced sleep wrapped in her soft voice and the sweet smell of her skin. Elizabeth seemed to surround him and he took a deep breath. He floated away on the memories of her, her arms around him, their home he'd forgotten and the warmth of her love. He would never forgive himself for putting her through this. A weak smile grazed his lips as he nodded off. No wonder Ronon always looked like he wanted to kick his ass.

_3 days later…..Christmas Day….._

John's eyes fluttered open for a moment, but his eyelids seemed oddly heavy. They slammed shut and he focused on the sounds around him. There was the constant annoying sound of the machine monitoring his heart rate and blood pressure. He'd been here many times before. The medicinal smell of the infirmary burned his nose and caused his stomach to churn with nausea.

"Elizabeth I've stopped the fentanyl drip that has kept him asleep since the surgery. He should awaken soon." Jennifer Keller's voice was fatigued.

"And the implant you discovered? Have you figured out what it was for?" Elizabeth sounded even worse. Her fatigue was thickly laced with fear.

"We'll have to send the implant back to the SCC- after Rodney has finished his turn at it of course. But if there is someone in the Milky Way with this kind of technology, they are going to get first dibs on keeping it. It's organic Elizabeth, that's why it was missed on all the scans. "Jennifer sighed. "Honestly, I think whoever was responsible for the implant screwed up. I don't think it should have been positioned where it was, the pressure on the temporal lobe affected his memory- I doubt they would have wanted to leave that as a clue something was wrong"

Rodney cleared his throat. "It's possible that the device was meant to capture new memories, when they removed it they would have a database that would tell them a lot more than they needed to know about Earth- and its defense capabilities."

"But is he okay? You just did surgery to remove something from his brain, I really don't give a damn why or how I just need to know if he's okay." Anguish ran heavy through Elizabeth's voice.

John groaned and raised his hand to where the dull ache in his head currently radiated from. His fingers brushed a large white bandage where there should have been only hair.

"Why don't you ask him yourself Elizabeth? I think he's waking. He will be fine." Jennifer took a step closer to John. "And John, don't worry, I only had to shave a little bit of your hair, you'll be back to your favorite unruly hairdo before you know it."

Elizabeth timidly touched John's hand. "You gave us quite a scare."

"Yeah, I've promised to quit doing that a few times I think."

Her head tucked sideways in surprise. "Yes you have…John?"

"You are entirely too far away, surely there is room in this bed for you- for both of you." John slyly smiled rubbing the ring on her finger.

Tears started streaming down her face and she took a step closer.

"Oh no you don't!" Keller took Elizabeth's arm nudging her away from the bed.

"Oh come on doc, brain surgery notwithstanding-" John weakly protested.

"Brain surgery nothing- Elizabeth's water just broke, look at the floor!"

Elizabeth's widened eyes darted down and back to John. "Oh Damn!" She whispered.

A/N: Thank you all for following and for the reviews. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and that you had a wonderful Christmas!


	14. Chapter 14

Six days later:

John stood beneath the Stargate tugging at the tie about his neck; a cold sweat was beading across his forehead. He tugged his jacket down noting how clammy his hands felt. Shuffling his feet nervously, he glanced at Ronon who was at his side wearing the largest bemused smile John had ever seen. John ran his fingers through his hair attempting to tame his wild spikes. Knowing it was futile he just shrugged sheepishly and tried not to worry that Elizabeth had changed her mind.

"How you holding up there sport?" General O'Neill strolled up with McKay and sarcastically faked a punch at John's shoulder. "Hey, don't look so worried, they'll be here."

Rodney frowned. "Yes please relax, who knows what you might accidentally do to Atlantis if you get any more frazzled." He suddenly brightened. "Yes, they'll be here. Now you've got to wait for _two_ women to get ready eh?"

Rodney's cackling stopped short when music began flowing through the Gateroom. The murmuring voices of their friends around them fell silent when Teyla appeared walking slowly towards them. She was holding his six day old baby girl and John instantly swelled with pride and a love so powerful it was almost painful. Teyla was taking the baby's tiny hand and together they tossed handfuls of white petals as they crossed the floor towards the Stargate. John knew there were tears in his eyes and that he was probably grinning like an idiot but he really didn't give a damn.

Jennifer came behind them, a freshly washed Sedge trotting happily beside her. John glanced in surprise towards O'Neill who was pretending to scowl at the dog.

"You're _welcome_." O'Neill shrugged nonchalantly.

Suddenly the whispering voices roared to a crescendo when a new and familiar song began to drift across the room. Everybody in Atlantis turned to look as Elizabeth appeared, glowing and beautiful in a glistening creamy gown. John's grin fell away, hell; his chin nearly hit the damn floor as he stared at her. She was radiant. Most days he still felt like he didn't deserve her, yet somehow, he knew it couldn't have been anyone but Elizabeth who somehow managed to wrap her love around him patching the holes and easing some of his darkness with her light.

Elizabeth was halfway down the makeshift isle when their eyes locked. Her eyes were like two gleaming emerald pools he would never get tired of staring into. Fierce whistling started to emerge from different sections of the Gateroom and soft laughter rolled through the air.

Elizabeth jumped in surprise; John realized she had stopped walking almost as though pinned beneath his gaze. A rosy flush graced her cheeks and she pulled up her bouquet of white flowers, gathered up her skirts in her hand and ran the rest of the way, crashing into his waiting arms.

"It's about time." John whispered and pressed a kiss against her ear. Reluctantly releasing her when more whistles burst through the air, he reached out and tussled the thick black hair on his daughter's head while Elizabeth planted a kiss on the child's chubby cheek. They straightened and turned to face O'Neill, John would have sworn a tiny giggle of laughter escaped Elizabeth's lips. He'd never seen her quite like this; she was so happy, almost giddy.

O'Neill cleared his throat. "Well, we all know why we are gathered here today."

John leaned closer. "This is legal right? You do have the authority to-"

"Hey! It's legal. I got the papers proving it; I printed them right off the internet. It cost me a hundred bucks you know." O'Neill tried to frown again, his face twisting as he failed miserably.

A large screen to the side of the Stargate jumped to life and suddenly the President was addressing the room.

"I apologize to address you today via recording and for not being able to attend in person. The Secret Service are a pretty tough bunch to sell on a lot of my travel plans, and those are just the Earth side destinations. I wanted to be a part of this day for many reasons. You, who have gathered before the Stargate, are now privileged to witness and to participate in a ceremony celebrating the public acknowledgment of a love which Elizabeth and John have for each other. This is a momentous step for any man and women. But John and Elizabeth have proven they are much more. This union is very special, the first marriage on Atlantis- what I'd now like to officially announce as Earth's first space settlement. In the next year we will be making big changes on Atlantis. I have been somewhat reluctantly persuaded to allow families to accompany their loved ones throughout their appointment to Atlantis."

Elizabeth smiled at John; he could hear the collective gasps of those in the room. This wasn't news to him, surprisingly they'd involved Elizabeth and himself in the decision. He was happy, but like the President also reluctant. Safety would always be a struggle in the Pegasus galaxy and now he would have his own family and so many others to protect. He found his hand threading through his hair again. It would probably be entirely gray before the year's end.

After a pause the President's voice continued. "When I learned Elizabeth was expecting a child, I had suggested the name Virginia if it was a girl. Virginia was the given name of the first child born to English parents in America. It seemed fitting for the child of the first American to be born upon Atlantis. It was with great pleasure I learned they loved and adopted this idea. I know it is a big name for such a tiny girl, but I have no doubt the child of John Sheppard and Elizabeth Weir will be able to handle anything the universe throws at her. John and Elizabeth, you have my blessing. Best wishes to you and to our Virginia."

Everyone in the room was on their feet when the screen went blank. Applause thundered through the room and Elizabeth reached over to rub Virginia's chunky leg. The baby was cooing happily, seeming to think all the activity around her was perfectly normal. John scanned the crowd before meeting Elizabeth's eyes. The tears inside made her eyes sparkle even more brilliantly. He squeezed her hand and nodded her attention back to O'Neill who was trying to wave people back into their seats.

"All right everyone, I'm not known for having a way with words like the President, or like anyone else for that matter. But I do know a little something about love. I know how precious it is, how fleeting it can be…" O'Neill's voice trailed off and Elizabeth reached forward placing her hand on his shoulder.

John couldn't imagine what the man had gone through, he'd only been a father for six days but he didn't know how a person could survive losing a child, the grief costing him a marriage. O'Neill smiled sadly and took Elizabeth's hand guiding it back to John.

"I had a little help with this next part." O'Neill started unfolding a crisp sheet of paper. "When you love someone, you do not love them all the time in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. That is impossible. It is even a disservice to pretend it is possible. Yet that is what most of us demand. We have such little faith in the ebb and flow of life and of love and of relationships. We leap forward at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb, for we are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanence, on duration, on continuity. But the only continuity possible in life, as in love, is in growth, in fluidity and in freedom, as dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in creating the same pattern."

"May John and Elizabeth keep the vows made on this day, in freedom, teaching each other who they are, what they yet shall be, enabling them to know that, in the fullness of being, they are more than themselves and more than each other, that they are all of us and that together we share joyously the life we've all pledged to defend on Earth, and on Atlantis- your home."

O'Neill tucked his head towards them. "Rings?"

John pulled the rings from his pocket and he and Elizabeth spoke in unison_. "_May this ring forever be to you the symbol of my ever growing love."

John felt a heat burning through his veins that he'd never felt before as he slipped the ring on her finger. He'd loved Elizabeth before, and then she'd given him Virginia. He'd worshipped Elizabeth then and now she'd given him- he couldn't even describe it, this tidal wave of feelings rocking his body completely off his center of balance. Now _she_ was his center of balance, the center of his family and the core of his being. Elizabeth slid the ring upon his own finger and John knew without a doubt that he would never be the same, because without her he could never again be complete.

"I now…" O'Neill glanced down at his wristwatch, "pronounce you…. husband and wife."

The Gateroom suddenly sounded like it came under fire, horns and noisemakers rattled furiously as cheers of "Happy New Year!" rang though the air.

O'Neill looked up and grinned. "Go on…you can kiss her!"

Elizabeth pulled Virginia from Teyla's arms and John pulled them both into his own. Gently moving around Virginia, John managed to capture Elizabeth's delicious lips in a kiss that could never convey everything that he felt in that moment.

"Happy New Year _husband_." Elizabeth's husky voice almost brought him to his knees. Her eyes were wet again and she hugged Virginia even closer.

"Happy New Year my girls." John kissed them both on the forehead before turning them all around. It was time to celebrate.

A/N: Thank you for all who have followed, reviewed and loved this story as much as I. I fear this storyline has come to an end, somewhat fitting on this New Year's Eve. Perhaps I will start a sequel for the next year, I'll have to see what my muse thinks. Happy New Year to you all!

A/N 2: I have committed the cardinal sin of "borrowing" some of Jack's speech – that he had a little help with- from a marriage vow website and I can not find it again. Apologies! Credit to the mystery writer though no writer was noted on the website. I did plan to at least notate the website…Ahhh!


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